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Blarney Castle of Cork, Ireland(爱尔兰科克市布拉尼城堡)
送交者: 天边的红霞 2020年05月24日09:05:10 于 [五 味 斋] 发送悄悄话

2016-07-09

Blarney Castle0001.JPG

【Aiden in English】

        I'm not a very superstitious type of person. Not that I don't say a favored team of mine is going to win because I wear my lucky socks since they are considered lucky. The supernatural, fictional idea of having an outside force changing an outcome for the unfavored is not only for the weak but also an unreliable source. This is why your parents don't want you to gamble because you will always lose money. I say "always", not from the fact that everyone loses to the chances, but because he or she does win the odd with the imaginary force of "luck" again. In math class, you learn how probability filters lower and lower in succession for something to happen again, like flipping a coin, "luck" has to be on your side. Most of the time, it just leaves you in the dust, so what is the point of leaning on something that isn't there? 

        Nevertheless, I am going to the Blarney Stone in the Blarney Castle of Cork (1446), Ireland for good fortune. 

        It was not my idea to stand in line for an hour and forty minutes to get the gift of eloquence. The Blarney Stone is the Stone of Scone that gives good fortune to those pilgrims who kiss it, or so they say for over 200 years. It was rumored to be Jacob's pillow that was brought to Ireland by the prophet Jeremiah based upon the Bible. For non-religious people, another rumor is that the rock came from a witch who was saved by a mortal. When the witch found out the man was an enemy, she decided to repay him with this stone as a gift. For the non-supernatural believers, I'm sorry, but everything is technically fictional to you. 

        The stone sits on a ledge hanging out of the top castle battlements. Not the most strategically spot for kissing, but the pictures are quite interesting. People can either interpret the position as crazy or suicidal, anything is possible. Many faces from the silver screen have come here, but none of that I remember, because their acting must suck if they need "luck". Apparently, the world is in bad shape, since the line to the stone must have contained over two-hundred tourists. 

        Nearing the top of the stone, the movement slowed. While waiting, many conversations about the time sprang up around us. "Oh, when it gets to the top, it gets really slow." "It should take about forty minutes from here." "Hey, I can see the top!" "If we don't get there in ten minutes, then I'll..." etc. Rarely any time guesses came true. No one expected a one hundred minute wait, but at the top, people really started to sound mad. "This'd better be the best rock I've ever seen." "Hey, I'll just tell all my friends on Twitter that I've seen this really cool rock that looks exactly like all the other ones in the world!" ... At last, I stood on the ledge of the Blarney Stone on the top, seeing the hole in the ground. It is very smart to have tourists lay back over a gap on the floor fifty feet up with nothing to catch you to kiss a stone that is probably unsanitary and would give me smallpox. With that all discarded, I leaned back and planted my lips on the cold stone. And now, I finally know what mud tastes like. 

        Writing this now, I don't feel all that much luckier. I have all I could ever need, and therefore, I don't need "luck". It is an imaginary idea, and playtime is a thing in the past. But... it wouldn't hurt for a few lotteries wins, am I right?

【红霞译文】

        我不属于特别迷信的一类人,并不等于说我所热衷的球队赢球不是因为自己脚上穿着象征好运的吉利袜子,脑子里那种超自然纯虚构的幻念无非想依赖外力去改变本不看好的结果,其实不过是内心虚弱的表现,何况又极不靠谱,这就是为什么父母不让子女赌博,因为到头来总会赔钱,这里提到“总会”不是指每次必定倒霉,偶尔也能碰到“时来运转”。数学课上,大家学过同一事件频发出现的概率很低,如同扔硬币一样,你得靠“手气好”才行,而多数情况下,你只能听天由命。既然如此,何苦要对虚无缥缈的事情抱有幻想呢?

        不管怎么,这回我要亲自到爱尔兰科克市最早建于1446年的布拉尼城堡去亲吻那块能叫人伶牙利口的巧言石。

        为长三寸不烂之舌而不惜耗掉一个小时四十分钟的时间排队,实在有悖我的初衷。巧言石类似于苏格兰历代国王加冕时使用的砂岩,过去两百多年来一直盛传它能给那些敬拜亲吻的朝圣者带来好运。根据《圣经》记载,这块斯昆石曾为雅各布的枕头,后被先知耶利米带到爱尔兰。假如你不信教的话,巧言石出自一位巫婆,她曾被凡人救过一命,当巫婆发现恩人竟是自己从前的仇敌时,便决定把这块石头作为礼物送给他以表谢意。假如你不迷信的话,很抱歉我没有更多东西好讲,幸亏在你看来说什么都是无稽之谈。

        巧言石悬放在城堡垛口顶部凸出部位,其位置绝对不适合用嘴亲吻,但取景照相另当别论,难怪有人以为要不是鬼迷心窍或者成心找死,犯不着抽风作践自己。许多名星新秀公众要人都来过这里,可惜我记不住他们的尊姓大名,因为诸位祈福的样子肯定不堪入目。显然世界前景不妙,否则怎么会有超过两百名的游客蜂拥而至。

        愈发接近巧言石跟前,队列移动得越是减速,我们等来等去,不知不觉地便淹没在流言蜚语声中。“哦,爬上城堡之后,方才意识到真正慢的地方还是最高处。”“从这里到巧言石大约需要四十五分钟。”“嘿,我能看见上面啦!”“如果十分钟后我再不爬上去,那么我将……”等等,难能可贵的是无论何时所有猜想全部百分之百地准确,没人想要等过一百分钟,一旦到了制高点,人们的语气开始变得歇斯底里。“这块石头必须是我今生今世见到的最了不起的。”“哼,我得告诉推特上所有亲朋好友,本人已经看到了最酷的岩石,它跟天底下其它碎石烂渣没啥区别!”……等好不容易到达顶端,我站在巧言石所在的堞口上,透过窟窿地表上的一切看得清情楚楚。最令人佩服的是,亲吻的时候游客要背对着高出地面五十英尺没有任何支撑物的空档之间,石面大概脏得要命,保不齐还会把天花传染给我,暂且不说别的,我背卧下去,将嘴巴对准冰凉的石头,现在总算明白了啃泥巴是什么滋味。

        写到这里,我尚未感觉鸿运当头,既然做完想做的事情,我不再奢望“运气”,权当借机放飞一下幻想,重新回味儿提时代的快乐。但是……真赢几张彩票又何乐不为,我说得对吗?



2016-07-09_Blarney Castle_Cattle-20001.JPG

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