2016-07-15

【Aiden in English】

        I don't believe in monsters that live in the bottom of lakes and have never been seen or detected by modern instruments. I also don't believe in monsters that eat humans. But apparently, most of the world thinks otherwise... 

        Don't tell the people at Loch Ness that the legendary monster Nessie isn't real. They can get pretty mad. It's the only reason they are on the map. It's also the only reason there was a tour going there today. The only thing that would resemble the Loch Ness monster in recent history is a sculpture near the hotel. And even it still looks like a dragon. The first sighting of this ... the monster was in the year of 565 by a woman heading inland. When she passed by the loch, a "long and black" monster slithered out of the water. Basically, that was the last sliver of evidence until the twentieth century. By then, the brilliant idea of newspapers has been invented, and the story can be passed on internationally overnight. Before long, the tale became a myth, which transformed into a legend. Nowadays, it's a bedtime story and a warning for little kids. "If you eat too many candies, Nessie will come and eat you!" Later on in life, the kids will realize how gullible they were, most likely bopping themselves on the head. 

        Loch Ness is not the name of the monster “Nessie”; it's just where the monster is located. 'Loch' in Gaelic means 'lake', and Ness is just a title. It is about 22 miles/35,000 m long and 1.5 miles/2,400 m wide.  The best estimate is around 755 ft. /230 m deep, but the silt at the bottom makes measurements difficult to read. If anyone was going to see the monster, it would be today. The tour stopped at the Urquhart Castle guarding the loch against enemies, now which are slimy ruins. Upon arriving, rain began to drip its way down from the sky. Dirt turned to mud; happiness turned to grumpiness. Mist crept down the side of mountains, clouding the vision of the tourists. Half expecting to see thunder and lightning and witness only the third written down “sighting”, I was very disappointed that within the hour. The rain had retired back to where it came from, and the loch was undisturbed. At times, I mistook a boat as the monster, but unfortunately, I was always wrong. The setting would've been perfect for an encounter, walking through a ruined castle, having mist settle over our heads. The stairs to the Grant Tower at the castle were really dangerous, being extremely narrow and slippery. It got absolutely bad when I realized it was a two-way path. I guess the castle was never designed for being a tourist attraction. Most of the roof was gone too, so there wasn't any sympathy from the buildings around me. And my luck sucked as well. 

        I understand that seeing the monster was a tiny chance. If no one has seen it for centuries, why should I? I think that's the wrong question... Is there really a Loch Ness monster?

【红霞译文】

        我才不信湖泊底下会有怪物出没，否则现代化仪器岂能一直测不出什么名堂。我也不信怪物吃人，但明摆着，多数人不以为然……

        千万莫对尼斯湖人讲传说中的尼斯湖水怪并非真有其事，否则他们定要找你算账，因为这恰好成为他们盘踞地图的唯一理由，当然这也是今天我们到此一游的初衷。本地除了一家酒店附近矗立着一尊近代史上广为流传的尼斯湖水怪雕像，模样看上去倒像条龙，其它什么蛛丝马迹也没有。乍看这个……水怪源于565年一位前往内地的妇女所描述的场景，当她途经湖区时，偶遇一条“又长又黑”的怪物窜出水面。这条所谓的最新见闻基本一直流传到廿世纪，之后随着报纸业蓬勃发展，消息传遍四面八方，没过多久，当年的热点话题随即变成天方夜谭，就这样活脱脱演绎出一个神话传说，如今睡前故事少不了它，每当吓唬淘气包的时候也被用作警世通言：“如果你吃太多糖果，那么尼斯湖水怪定来吃你！”受过懵吓的孩童长大之后方才意识到当年如此轻信谣传，禁不住要敲打几下自己的脑袋瓜子。

        尼斯湖命名与水怪无关，但水怪出处却取自尼斯湖。在盖尔语中，“海湾”代表“湖”，尼斯仅仅是称呼而已。尼斯湖长约22英里／35公里，宽约1.5英里／2400米，估计深度755英尺／230米，因为底部积有淤泥，所以很难把握测量的准确性。假如有人想见水怪，今天倒是个好日子，我们先来厄克特城堡参观，该工事以前曾用来扼守尼斯湖抵御敌人入侵，如今早已变成废墟。大队人马刚抵达目的地的时候，天正噼里啪啦地下着细雨，致使土路变成泥潭，让本来快乐的心情蒙上了一层阴影，雾霾渐渐垂落到山边，云烟恰巧挡住游客的视野，电闪雷鸣好似拉开阵势迎接水怪粉墨登场，弄得我在头一个钟头情绪非常低落。雨终于收工回家，尼斯湖方才露出本来面目，有几回我甚至错把游弋于湖面上的小船当成水怪，可惜事与愿违。对外来游客而言，漫步在废墟城堡之中，置身于云雾缭绕之下，无不深为周围的湖光山色所打动。通往格兰特塔顶的楼梯又窄又滑，路况相当危险，况且又分上下双行道，爬起来非常吃力，我觉得当初设计城堡时怎么也想象不到这里会变成旅游景点。眼下绝大多数房屋上无片瓦，我没啥心思去缅怀其沧桑历史，再说今天的运气本来就够背的。

        亲眼目睹尼斯湖水怪的几率微乎其微，对之我早有心理准备，何况过去若干世纪都没有任何佐证，我能有什么办法？在我看来，其实这本来就是谬论……难道真有尼斯湖水怪？