設萬維讀者為首頁 廣告服務 技術服務 聯繫我們 關於萬維
簡體 繁體 手機版
分類廣告
版主:若男
萬維讀者網 > 笑林之聲 > 帖子
婚姻中的男女
送交者: oko 2003年10月01日18:46:36 於 [笑林之聲] 發送悄悄話

Marriage (Part I)

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing,boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night . . . whether you're here or not."

*******************************************
Marriage (Part II)

Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'"

"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, "Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"

*******************************************************
Marriage (Part III)

Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house. After sometime he realises he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."

"In bed this early, doing what?"

"Getting a second opinion!"

*******************************************************
Marriage (Part IV)

A man has six children and is very proud of his ahievement. He is so proud of himself, that he starts in spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice,"Shall we go home Mother of six?'"

His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

*******************************************************

LADIES,ALWAYS REMEMBER: "God may have created man before woman.... but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece."

0%(0)
0%(0)
標 題 (必選項):
內 容 (選填項):
實用資訊
回國機票$360起 | 商務艙省$200 | 全球最佳航空公司出爐:海航獲五星
海外華人福利!在線看陳建斌《三叉戟》熱血歸回 豪情築夢 高清免費看 無地區限制
一周點擊熱帖 更多>>
一周回復熱帖
歷史上的今天:回復熱帖
2002: 小布什笑話2則
2002: 小布什的大學時代