Points of Wisdom 经典短句-ZT

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another,
"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong
finger?" The other woman replied, "Yes I am, I
married the wrong man"

在一个鸡尾酒舞会上，一个女人对另外一个女人说：“你结婚戒指带错手指了。” 另一个回答说：“嗯，人也嫁错了。”
---------------------------------------------------------------------
A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband
wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They
all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

一位女士在“找丈夫”广告栏目下登了一条启示。次日她收到了上百封信，内容均是：“我可以把我的丈夫让给你。”

------------------------------------------------------------------
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better
revenge than to let her keep him.
如果一个女人偷了你的老公，最好的复仇方式便是让她继续拥有他。

--------------------------------------------------------------------
Eighty percent of married men cheat in the U.S.A. The
rest cheat in Canada.
在美国80%得男人撒谎，其余的20%在加拿大撒谎。

-------------------------------------------------------------------
A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she
is finished.

女人要到结婚时才算完整，结婚后便完蛋了。
--------------------------------------------------------------------
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does
it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I
don't know son, I'm still paying."
小男孩问爸爸：“结婚要花多少钱呀？”
“不知道，”爸爸说，“我还没付完。”

--------------------------------------------------------------------
Young son: Is it true Dad, that in some parts of
Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries
her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.

年轻的儿子问爸爸：“这是真的吗？ 在非洲的某国家，男人只有在结婚后才知道太太是谁？”
爸爸：“儿子，这种事情在每个国家都发生。”

-------------------------------------------------------------------
Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what
real happiness was until I got married; and by then it
was too late."
有女人曾曰：“直至结婚我才晓得真正的快乐是什么，但是已经太晚了。”

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over
intelligence.
婚姻便是想象力战胜智力的成功案例。

--------------------------------------------------------------------
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict
attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

如果你想要引起太太对你的每句话都给与极大重视，那么，就在梦中说吧。

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go
through life thinking they had no faults at all.

想想吧，如果不结婚，男人们便会认为自己终生没有范过什么错。
--------------------------------------------------------------------
First guy: "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

男一：我太太是个天使！
男二：哥们 你真幸运，我太太她还活着！