How to Turn Your Good Boyfriend into Husband

There must be many girls (and boys) out there trying very hard to find husbands (or wives) in this world. Therefore, it might be helpful to them for people who have experienced the similar processes to share their ideas, methods, or tricks on how to turn their good boyfriends into husbands. Here, I like to present 10 methods or tricks to girls on how to turn a good boyfriend in husband.

(1) Be honest

The honesty or the trust should be the most important factor in determining whether a girl should turn her boyfriend into her husband because marriage is a lifetime commitment made to each other between a man and a woman. Though it is often the love or the attraction between the opposite sex that brings a boy and a girl together to become close friends, the basic building blocks of marriage are not the love but the honesty or the mutual trust. Once a man and a woman get married, they should keep their trust and the commitment for the rest of their life.

(2) Be polite

Boys and girls are inherently different: men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Boys are supposed to be strong, both physically and mentally, and take greater responsibility in important matters. On the other hand, girls are supposed to be polite or behave graciously, especially in public or in company with boys. Men are born to be leaders and like to be in control. Therefore, a polite or a gracious girl will much more be loved or asked for getting married by her boyfriend.

(3) Be encouraging

Both men and women have their personal dreams when they are young. However, when the two get married, either one or both of them may have to give up part or all of their dreams as a result of family responsibility and social obligation. A man generally takes a huge family responsibility with an intensive social pressure and he may be more afraid that an earlier marriage would prevent from or postpone the realization of his dream. Therefore, a constant encouragement from a girl with a promise, willingness, or an action to assist the boy realizing his dream will certainly help the boy to ask the girl to marry him in the earliest possible time.

(4) Tell his mother something about you but not everything

Marriage involves not only two people but also two families. A boy will be more willing to ask a girl to marry him if his family has already accepted the girl. Therefore, it is certainly helpful for a girl to establish communications with her boyfriend’s family by talking to his mother or other family members such as his sisters, if any, in an early stage or on a regular basis. However, because of the rapid changes of the society and usual generation gap, his mother may not agree with or may not like what a typical young girl’s thoughts or actions in the current world. Here, telling his mother something but not everything means to have an effective communication with her boyfriend’s mother in a good and decent manner.

(5) Exercise together

Doing physical exercise or doing it regularly is an important component of daily activities to keep one’s body fit and healthy. Many girls like to spend precious times with their boyfriends on doing all-day shopping and vacation traveling, etc. Every man or woman knows the fact that it is a waste of man’s time to ask him to follow a lady all-day long in various department stores for (window) shopping most of the time. Vacation traveling together is good but is rare and expensive. On the other hand, doing exercise or sport activities together, especially on a regular basis, may better serve the purpose of bringing their relationship closer because of the frequent close communications between the two in addition to producing the fitted and healthy bodies to both of them.

(6) Do not make idle threats.

Men are from Mars so they are often rational and women are from Venus so they are often emotional. Because of the inherent differences between men and women on their personalities, some sort of conflicts is unavoidable in their daily lives. This is especially true when both men and women are very good and they often have their independent opinions on various matters. Different opinions may lead to arguments, which may in turn lead to quarrels or discussions. Well, of course, frank discussions are much better because those discussions will certainly increase the mutual understanding between the two people. However, under no circumstance should one, this “one” often happening to be an emotional woman, make idle threats of cutting off or terminating the relationship between the two in those arguments or quarrels. Do not make such a threat, period. If you do, the consequence will always be very serious. You may either deeply hurt your boyfriend’s feeling for a long time or push your boyfriend to a point where he will not be able to return.

(7) When conflict arises, talk to your boyfriend first before approach a friend

Your good boyfriend is supposed to be your best friend, your closest friend and your most trustworthy friend. Naturally, you need to talk to your boyfriend first when conflict arises. You talk to him patiently until you both find a good solution to resolve the conflict. In the process of talking, quarreling and arguing, you may get somewhat angry. You are angry because your boyfriend simply cannot understand your point view and especially, unlike several cases that happened previously, you think this time you are really very reasonable and logical. You are still angry at your boyfriend and what can you do? You do this: you close your eyes and count to ten, then give your boyfriend a big hug. And then continue talking to him in a patient and gentle manner. After all these fail, you may approach a close friend for a different opinion on the matter.

(8) Write him a love letter or a love poem, with pen

I know now it is the internet and high-tech age and nobody cares to write letters with pen anymore. However, write him a love letter or a love poem with pen, though an old fashion to express your love feeling is still a very effective way to grasp your boyfriend’s heart. You write your love letter with your pen and your heart, not with your computer or ipad. You should seriously copy your love letter from a draft version and try not to make mistakes (e.g., noticing the difference between “diary” and “dairy”, the difference between 愛 and 受, etc). You may mail him the letter or put the letter in his pocket.

You do not have to use the word “love” explicitly in your love letter. You may describe your love feeling toward him by a slight exaggeration since love relationship between two people has never been an exact science. Here, let me show an example about exaggeration by two versions of writing describing the same love feeling. The slightly exaggerated version is: (1) “Darling, my darling, we have been together climbing all the high mountains, crossing many torrential rivers, and overcoming all the difficulties. I strongly believe that it is now a good time for us to start a new page of our relationship. I am waiting for your call and I am waiting for the happiest and most important moment of my life”. The plain and the simple version is: (2) “Hi, we have been together doing all-day shopping many times and I want to marry you.” Obviously, the first description, where the word “shopping” or “marry” never appeared, is much more exquisite, heartfelt, and sensational than the second one and is therefore highly recommended.

(9) Show your care to your boyfriend by some daily trivial things

Not every nice girl is able to follow all the suggestions provided above. For example, I made this suggestion above: “Write him a love letter or a love poem, with pen”. Well, this might be a very difficult task to some girls. I am not sure whether a good graduate majoring in literature with a master or a doctoral degree is able to write a love letter to make her boyfriend “魂飘断肠” so that he will be able to ask his girlfriend marry him right away. At the same time, any girl is able to show her care and appreciation to her good boyfriend by some daily trivial things, which, in a long run, may effectively move her boyfriend in a right direction. Here, let me list a few examples of trivial things that every girl is able to do:

(i) When you go for your own window shopping or clothes shopping, buy him something to show him that you are constantly thinking of him even when you are purely doing something for yourself. You do not have to buy expensive things under these circumstances. You may only need to buy a tie or a pair of socks, just reminding him that you are thinking of him all the time.

(ii) Learn how to tie man’s tie and show the skill to him. Ladies usually only wear skirts but not wear ties. You learn how to tie man’s tie solely for the purpose of caring your boyfriend. You actually tie his tie to show that you care him.

(iii) Feed him the food. He might be busy with thinking of his project, playing his computer, etc. at a normal lunch or dinner time when he is supposed to be hungry --- you feed him the food to save his time to show your support. He is not busy at all and you guys are having lunch or dinner together --- you feed him the food to make you look really very charming in his eyes.

(iv) ..............

(10) Do not always be late and please call if you think you are going to be late

It is not unusual for an average girl to be late to an appointment with her boyfriend, to be late to her work place, or to be late in a vacation travel. Apparently, girls can always find some excuses to explain why they are late whereas, in fact, I think the true reason of their being late is often the underestimate of their make-up times before they leave. Therefore, please reserve enough time for your make-up and be seriously aware that the number of your late arrivals to your boyfriend’s appointments is inversely proportional to the number of the gifts your boyfriend will give to you. The scientific reason behind such a relationship is due to the fact that the number of the gifts your boyfriend plans to buy for you is directly proportional to the degree of his happiness. He will be less happy if you are always late. At a certain stage when your boyfriend thinks that he has already bought enough gifts for you, then one day he will most likely say the following to you:

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Darling, my sweetheart, I've always believed in numbers; and the equations and logics that lead to reason. But after a lifetime of such pursuits, I ask, “What truly is logic? Who decides reason?” My quest has taken me through the physical, the metaphysical, the delusional -- and back. And I have made the most important discovery of my career, the most important discovery of my life: It is only in the mysterious equations of love that any logic or reasons can be found. I'm only here tonight because of you. You are the reason I am. You are all my reasons. Darling, would you marry me?
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Please carefully read this last trick one more time and think about the entire logic between “late” and “marry”.

In conclusion, I have presented the following ten methods or tricks on “How to Turn Your Good Boyfriend into Husband”:

(1) Be honest
(2) Be polite
(3) Be encouraging
(4) Tell his mother something about you but not everything
(5) Exercise together
(6) Do not make idle threats
(7) When conflict arises, talk to your boyfriend first before approach a friend
(8) Write him a love letter or a love poem, in pen
(9) Show your care to your boyfriend by some daily trivial things
(10) Do not always be late and please call if you think you are going to be late

There is a saying in marshal art that says “you will always defeat your enemy if you know a special trick (一招鲜，吃遍天)”. There is also a well-known saying in science that says “if you know three tricks of math, physics and chemistry, you can freely travel in the science world (学会数理化，走遍天下都不怕).” I am quite sure that these ten tricks should be more than enough for girls and ladies to pick and choose to help to realize their dreams of finding good husbands.