2018-06-10

【Aiden in English】

        By now I have no idea why I’m writing things on this blog. Most of these posts are so petty and insignificant that I’m having a difficult time finding content to jot down on paper. This recent Sunday, I participated in yet ANOTHER graduation ceremony, my “final time” receiving an award on the podium and being a part of Guanghua Chinese School in PA. That’s what they said last year and is what they will say next year. Furthermore, more than half the school barely listens to the speaker’s words, and I doubt most kids understand the Chinese vocabulary. 

        However, the fact that I’m saying this demonstrates the profound effect of an annual event occurring over and over, perpetually ingrained in my years. While I’ve already graduated, this is still a nail in a treehouse. One day, today, someone removed that nail, and the treehouse loses a bit of its integrity (Perhaps that is a bit dramatic, but I am an English writing teacher, so dramatizing ideas is allowed). And yet the treehouse just stands, with a slight creak in one of the joints now lacking support. 

        Next year I’ll find a replacement, another event to cover Sundays, but it’ll feel different. Granted, this year already felt different in the addition of AP Chinese. Nevertheless, I still got a gold medal of the President Volunteer Service Award for my volunteer hours (100 hours as a teen at the age between 12-16 years old), which is why I had to participate in the graduation ceremony. While I felt slightly left out when a few of my friends sat in the crowd and I stood on the edges because of my teacher status, it did occur to me that I was becoming more and more an adult. That definition, in my mind, equals not having to follow orders intended for children, which in this case is to sit and be quiet. 

        Life comes along later and delivers usually some large event that catastrophically changes something within. Today definitely was not that day, but the beginning of a chain of events that would occur which may cause large change. Final exams dawn on the horizon and my last days of Pennbrook Middle School are dwindling. Both of which, like Chinese School graduation will contribute to a change within my heart, most likely for the worse. 

        It is said that each event in life builds something on your path, defining you as a person. So as I stand and watch fellow classmates graduate and give meaningless speeches in front of a crowd of distracted children, I can’t help envisioning the coming days, days filled with tension, suspense, and sadness. I stand watching others who probably will experience the same thing in their own time. I ask myself, whom I will be at the other end of this week? Will I come out to be the same student-focused only on school and nothing else, or an adult who takes on more challenges? 

【紅霞譯文】

        到目前為止，我說不清為何要在這個博客上寫東西，多數帖子缺乏實質性內容，無外乎雞毛蒜皮的瑣事。僅以這個星期天為例，我又一次參加畢業典禮，作為賓州光華中文學校子弟“最後一次”站到領獎台上，去年說的明年接着說，而且估計有一半以上的學生在代表們發言的時候開小差，我懷疑多數學童聽不懂文縐縐的漢語措辭。

        然而，值得強調的是一年一度的盛會具有深遠影響，它早就銘刻在我的腦海里，我雖已畢業，但還是樹屋上的一枚釘子，依舊與光華中文學校有着千絲萬縷的聯繫。有朝一日或今天，一旦那個釘子被拔掉，樹屋勢必會喪失完整性（這裡也許帶點戲劇性，但我作為英文寫作老師，可以放飛遐想），樹屋雖在，但終究因為卯合部位缺乏支撐而吱嘎作響。

        明年我得為星期天找件差事來做，到時肯定體驗迥異。誠然，除了選讀大學漢語預修課程，今年其它方面業已發生變化，暫且不說別的，基於義工時間長短，我還榮獲“總統志願服務獎”金牌（十二～十六歲少年需做100小時義工），這正是出席畢業頒獎典禮的原因所在。當我看到幾位朋友坐在台下而自己卻因教師身份站在觀眾席上，心中難免有點邊緣化的感覺，我確實發現自己逐漸長大成人，言外之意，這回我不必像在校生那樣依照規定安靜入座。

        接下來生活里時不時出現觸目驚心的大事，今日絕對不是那一天，但可能是一連串天翻地覆變化的開始：期終考試即將到來，賓溪初中學校生活接近尾聲，如同中文學校畢業在我心中泛起漣漪，很可能更平添幾分惆悵。

        俗話說得好，人生中的每一段經歷都是為你的成功鋪路，路是人走出來的。因而當我站在一旁註視着曾經的同窗少年走出校門並對交頭接耳的小學生抒發畢業感言時，我禁不住聯想到未來幾天將被緊張、焦慮和傷心所替代，身邊其他人恐怕或早或晚也會經歷同樣的遭遇。我捫心自問，本周的另一頭我又是何許人也？我是否甘做原來那個“兩耳不聞窗外事一心只讀聖賢書”的學童，還是成為敢於直面更多挑戰的成人？

Crosslinks(相關博文):

2017 GHCS Commencement(2017屆光華中文學校畢業典禮)

2016 GHCS Commencement(2016屆光華中文學校畢業典禮)

2015 GHCS Commencement—Bitter-Sweet-Salty(羨慕嫉妒愛)

2014 GHCS Commencement—Bamboo(2014屆光華畢業典禮—蜀苑)

2013屆光華畢業典禮拾遺(2013 GHCS Commencement—Potpourri)

2012屆光華中文學校畢業典禮(2012 GHCS Commencement)

2010屆光華中文學校畢業典禮(2010 GHCS Commencement)