“安妮”——四場表演

Susan著 小哭譯

參加“安妮”是我人生中美好的經歷之一。其中我最喜歡的部分、願意日復一日不斷地重複着的部分是表演。不管演出了多少場，我也永不會厭倦，我發誓。

周四：上演的第一夜。那天，整個學校里到處充滿了“安妮”的氣氛。“安妮”的演員及劇組的每一個成員都穿上了他們的“安妮”T恤衫。那是一件灰色的T恤衫，胸前有“安妮”的標誌，袖子上有我們學校的名字。我以前從來沒有過團體T恤衫，所以這件“安妮”的T恤衫對我來講很特別。穿着這件衣服我很自豪，與走廊上的人們不斷地伸手高擊掌。成為比自己大的某件事的一部分很有趣兒，特別當我還是其中的一個重要組成時（我是三個副導演之一）。我們一直很努力，三個半月以來在放學後數小時地排練着。而這個周四，我們的辛苦工作終於要拿出來展示了。

那天下午，我坐校車回家。因為“安妮”排練恰好在放學後，我已經很長時間沒有坐校車回家了。重新再做某件常規的事情很奇怪似的，在家等待的三個小時很痛苦。最後，六點鐘的時候，我回到學校，為即將在一個小時後開演的第一場表演做準備。

有很長的一段走廊被封起來留給演員和劇組，還有五塊告示牌，上面寫着“僅演員和劇組成員可進入”，另外還有一個孩子站在入口那兒阻擋家長。你可能會認為五塊告示板，足夠讓人們明白這事兒了，但是顯然每一個家長都認為他/她很特別。在走廊的遠外、觀眾看不到的地方，演員在那兒換裝及化妝。開始的四十五分鐘我們主要就是做這事兒。由於我不是演員 ，我就只站在邊上看。我多麼希望自己帶了相機來！在這四十五分鐘的時間裡，演員們變了個樣兒。戲服、假髮、化妝品和一些嬰兒粉將每個演員從現代的青少年變成了二十世紀三十年代的孤兒、僕人還有成年人。男生們甚至也得化妝！

當每個人都搞好了後，我們在T老師的教室里開了一個會。導演們提醒我們要聲音響亮並且充滿活力，突出我們的聲音。C老師發表了一個非常動情的講演，說她是如何地為我們自豪，對她來講我們有多麼地特別。她說她家的其它每個成員都在他們的房間裡展示一些令他們驕傲的紀念品或證書，而她則是唯一什麼都沒有的人——因為她引以自豪的是我們，是“安妮”的演員和劇組。那晚她的家人都在外面，她真的是很激動，想給他們看看我們有多麼地棒。我們用響亮的掌聲回應了她。之後W老師把我們帶回了現實中，她說：請將手機關閉，後台不能吃東西，聲音要響亮，吐字要清晰等等。就那些，然後……就到點了。

我們晚了幾分鐘開始。等到J、G和我（三個副導演）跑到舞台上時，燈已經暗了。我們快速地致了歡迎辭，並提醒大家關閉手機以及類似的例行常規。我努力地微笑着直面觀眾，以便讓觀眾覺得我們的歡迎很有誠意，而不是像J一樣地只是機械地讀着稿子上的文字。在三百人左右的觀眾面前，我一點也不緊張。我是提台詞兒的（以防演員忘記了他們的台詞），所以我有最好的座位：就在所有人前面的第一排，舞台的最邊邊上。這麼好的位置竟然不用買票：）

我的任務是提台詞兒，但是演員們根本就沒需要我！！當男管家錯誤地把夾克上下顛倒着穿在沃巴克斯爸爸身上時，出現了一點點小小的錯誤，然而他們自己就搞定了。當男管家說“對不起”時，沃巴克斯爸爸說“沒關係，每個人都會犯錯誤。”，觀眾席上爆發出了一陣笑聲，因為每個人都知道那不是計劃中的部分。開演夜的另一個錯誤是當我跑到舞台上幫助劇組收拾時，被一個搬桌子的人絆倒了！她沒有看見我伏在她後面清理地板，所以她幾乎倒在了我身上。我很高興那時燈處於半暗狀態，否則別人會看到我因為難堪而羞紅的臉！

除了那兩個小小的失誤，我們的開演夜很棒！表演還是有些生疏：有演員跳過了幾句台詞，舞台劇組在轉換布景時花的時間過長，我覺得歌唱者有時沒精神。然而，對於開演夜來講，這已經是相當地精彩了！觀眾看不出來有多少錯誤，就算是看出來了，他們也非常地包容，在我們弄錯的地方大笑。因為他們知道那是我們第一場表演，所以他們一點也沒有為難我們。

周五：第二場。座無虛席，每張票都賣了出去，每一個座位都有人。令人傷心地是，那是我們四場表演中最糟糕的一場。除了麥克風出了很多的問題，其餘的情況和前一天一樣。麥克時有時無，有時好用有時不好用，有時還發出嚇人的簫叫。這真的讓每個歌唱演員都很擔心，而且因為很擔心，他們失去了很多快樂的能量。M的聲音緊張得發抖，一點也沒有信心，很不自然。開始我以為那是麥克的原因，後來我發現她病得很厲害。那天要不是不得不演“安妮”，她根本就不用到學校來。

因為麥克的原因和M的病，我們表演得不是很好，觀眾的反應也不怎麼好。然而，他們還是認為表演真的很不錯，儘管搞砸了那麼多。我想我覺得那麼糟糕只是因為我知道它應該有多好。做為一個常規的表演，這已經相當地好了，它只是沒有達到應有的高度而已。唯一讓我振奮的事兒是我帶了相機，照了很多照片。

周六下午：我們的下午場演出，是所有四場中最好的一場。這也是我父母來觀看的一場，所以我相當地激動。表演前，導演們對我們發表了鼓舞士氣的講話，關於要我們保持像前天晚上一樣的精力和可信度是多麼地重要。他們說，通常第三場表演是最沒力氣也是出錯最多的一場，因為大家都認為他們已經很熟練了，就不再像前兩場那樣認真對待。首演夜，每一個人都很激動；周五晚上，因為觀眾最多，每一個都很專心；但是下午場通常人們會懈怠下來。導演表揚了每一個人，說他們在周五做得有多好，並且鼓勵他們這個下午場也要如同周五一樣。然而，我有不同看法。我真的想對每一個人大聲喊：大聲點兒，更有精神點兒，在枕頭大戰那場戲，要更好鬥一些。然而，我只是副導演，不是老師，我不能發表意見。

後來，看到我們在那個下午表演得那麼好時，大家都很吃驚，甚至導演們也很吃驚。他們以為下午場會是最糟糕的一場，結果竟然是最好的。根本就沒有出現任何失誤；每一個人都充滿了活力；所有的演員都聲音宏亮；麥克風也沒有出現故障。每一件事兒都那麼完美，真是一場順利與漂亮的表演。我媽媽完全被征服了。她本以為是一場粗糙的、初中生的表演而已，結果她看到了精彩的、專業的、有趣兒的表演。我媽媽不是很容易被打動的，所以我們的“安妮”能讓她感到驚訝就像是贏得了奧斯卡獎一樣。

周六晚上：最後一場，我所有的朋友們都來看的一場。這一場相當地不錯！只是在剛開始第一幕時有一點兒麥克故障，但是很快就修好了。其它的每一件事兒都很完美。唯一不好的是觀眾沒有下午場反應那麼熱烈。在下午場期間，不只是我們表演得好，觀眾也是最好的。他們在所有的笑點大笑，對所有令人吃驚的地方感到震驚。他們的反應和我們想要的正正好。周六晚，觀眾有點太安靜了。然而，還是相當地不錯！依我的看法，這是我們第二好的一場表演。

當表演快要結束時，演員和劇組的情緒開始低落。我們都知道“安妮”就要畫上一個句號了。那些從六年級開始就參加HMS所有表演的八年級生開始有點淚眼朦朧，因為這是我們在HMS的最後一場表演。當開始謝幕時，扮演安妮的女孩出來鞠躬，我們能看到她的眼裡淚光閃閃。然後，謝幕結束了，觀眾散了，我們回到後台走廊，換下演出服。在女更衣室，每個人都在哭。我沒有哭，但是當我進去時，她們開始跟我擁抱，我的眼底也開始有刺痛的感覺。所以我快速地離開了女更衣室，我不想在大家面前哭泣。

我們花了這麼多的時間排練和表演，我們為這些表演投入了這麼多的精力，表演是這段時間以來最好的事情，能給觀眾帶來開心和快樂是一件令人喜悅的事情。但是然後，“呯”地一聲就結束了。結束得如此之快！我願意用所有的一切去換得以後每晚房子裡的燈都暗下、舞台上的燈光亮起來、夜復一夜地經歷那種興奮的表演狀態。但是不可能。我是一個學生，不是一個專業的副導演。現在，是時間重回正常的學生生活中來了。

【小哭介紹背景】 譯過上一篇聚會的文章，關於表演的這篇小文就顯得缺少了很多令人感動的內容。也許是那個聚會上發生的事情太特別了吧，受到感動的不只是Susan他們這一群孩子，一些讀者也告訴我他們被那個聚會感動了。然而，之所以有那個感人的聚會，是因為孩子們在四場表演之後對整個活動的留戀與不舍。在孩子們眼裡，這四場表演，太難忘了。

Susan說“安妮”T恤衫是她頭一件團隊活動隊服，這一點我並不同意。至少在一個盒子裡，我保存了從波士頓搬家過來時整理出來的一系列T恤衫，其中就有我們全家在波士頓連續三年參加的“為飢餓而走”活動的志願者T恤衫，每年都是不同的顏色；而她的女童子軍和游泳隊的隊服，也都應該和“安妮”T恤衫屬於同類性質的。只是，她太熱愛“安妮”這個活動了，把其餘的都忘記了似的。但“安妮”T恤衫確實是唯一一件關於學校活動的隊服。

在下發的一疊購物清單中，T恤衫是必買的，而演員們還要租服裝，所以Susan不用租服裝這事兒幫我們節省了幾十塊錢。這對於處於經濟低谷中的我們，確實是一個好消息：）當時的訂單上還有大合照以及表演光盤，都在四、五十塊錢以上一份，想了半天后告訴Susan，媽媽現在沒有能力支持這部分，Susan雖然有些失望但表示理解。還有抽獎票，我們更是沒有買的念頭。看來看去，可選項只有觀看演出和參加周五晚上的演員與劇組聚會門票少於十塊錢一張，最後就支持了這部分，可連給小寶單獨買個座位都沒捨得。後來看到表演那麼精彩，知道就算是演員們的服裝租金高達60美元還是80美元，其實還是有缺口，所以活動才會賣那些紀念品籌錢，心裡也有一絲難過。但願“窮人的孩子早當家”吧。

想當年，為了Susan在幼兒園畢業典禮上主持人的裙裝，沒時間管孩子的我們，一聽說孩子竟然獲得了主持人一角兒，老師要家長給孩子送舞台上用的裙子，興奮加上感謝，還有也不知道哪條裙子正正好符合老師的那些要求，我於是和恰巧從工地返家的Susan爸衝到店裡一口氣買了四、五條公主裙送到學校讓老師去選，那時對Susan參加活動的經濟支持從來就沒有讓我們為難過，但那時我們沒有時間陪着孩子長大，讓她小小年紀就吃在學校睡在學校，而我們還在為自己有能力花錢買教育服務而沾沾自喜。

出國前後經濟條件巨大的落差，似乎並沒有很影響Susan的心情，特別是在Susan有了信仰之後。對於錢帶來的困窘Susan基本上都能夠泰然處之，倒是我有時會在心裡生出絲絲的難過。我一直希望孩子在經濟上的感覺會是所處群體的中等狀態，可是在這個學區大概這小小的願望只能停留在夢想的階段了。不過Susan在聚會後回來說，相比於多數同學們富裕但並不那麼溫馨的家庭，我們家雖然清貧了點，可是我們很相愛，家庭氣氛好，她更喜歡。她非常害怕失去我們現在所擁有的一切，覺得現在這些就已經足夠了。每晚的飯前禱告，她常常都是感謝上帝賜給了我們家這麼多的祝福，這讓我相對安心不少。

周五晚場生病的那個孩子，為了表演硬撐着，Susan說這個孩子跟她一個校車，周五都沒上學。她說她們每個人都確實太熱愛表演了！後來我跟一個爸爸說起這個事兒，那個爸爸說好像要參加課後活動的話，至少得在放學前到校上一節課！這個規矩我還真的沒聽過，到現在為止也沒有去落實過。那個爸爸說，他的孩子有的時候不想上學，但是想參加課後活動，所以就在快要放學的時候說他的病好了可以去上學了：）然後推測說這個生病的孩子估計那天還是去上了最後一節課了，否則學校應該不會同意她參加表演的。

Susan因為不用表演，有機會拍了不少後台照，加上周五、周六兩個晚上的聚會照，她手上有很多非常有趣兒的照片。大導演T老師聽說後，感到非常地意外，讓Susan把照片傳給他，而演員們則說這些照片應該上學校年度紀念冊。這讓Susan又着實興奮了一下。在我眼裡極不會分類整理的她，竟然把照片整理得井井有條，也傳了一份兒給我欣賞，這事兒讓我對她又刮目相看了一下。孩子在活動中好像就這麼慢慢地成長了？！Susan一直都說，她是克拉林老師選中的副導演，三個副導演似乎是分屬於三個老師的，T老師有事兒從來不先找她，哪怕T老師的“專屬”副導演不在場，這讓Susan很失落。直到最後當T老師發現Susan在畫表演所需的兩個畫板後，才把另外的畫畫兒任務也交給她，讓她覺得自己在T老師眼裡有了用處。

Susan八年級前半年的戲劇課是由克拉林老師上的，後半年的由T老師上，T老師還不熟悉她，似乎還沒覺得她是一個“好學生”。通過這次畫畫兒，估計會有一些了解了吧？戲劇課本是一門選修課，可是Susan喜歡，所以她就在乎，祝願她在T老師的課堂上收穫到和克拉林老師的課堂一樣的快樂和自信吧！而T老師，是一個快退休的男老師，其組織能力，讓我驚訝到“掉到下巴”的程度，超強！Susan爸說你得見識到一些強人，否則你太驕傲了：（

關於這個活動，前前後後三、四個月的時間，我有太多的感想想寫了。可是限於篇幅，就到此為止吧。從我見證到的過程來看，如果有可能，哪怕辛苦點兒，家長也應該支持孩子參加學校組織的這類大型活動。原因？值得啊！孩子會對學校有強烈的歸屬感啊！當Susan覺得她屬於HMS後，每天就很渴望去上學了，就不再說搬家搬得學校里沒有人和事兒讓她期待了。屬於一個集體的感覺很好。

附上英文原文：

Annie—The Four Shows

Being in Annie has been one of the best experiences of my life. My favorite part of the whole thing, the part that I would love to live through again and again, day after day, is the performance. No matter how many times we perform the show, I swear, I will never get tired of it.

Thursday: opening night. That day, the whole school was filled with Annie spirit. Everyone who was on the Annie cast or crew wore their Annie t-shirts. It was a gray t-shirt with the Annie design on the front and our school name on the sleeve. I have never had a group t-shirt before, so the Annie shirt was special to me. I proudly wore it and high-fived people around the hallways. It was fun being part of something that was bigger than myself, especially when I was an important part of that “something” (I was one of the three Assistant Director).We had been working hard, rehearsing for hours and hours after school for three and a half months. And that Thursday, our hard work would finally pay off!

That afternoon, I rode the bus home. I had not riden the bus home for such a long time due to Annie rehearsals right after school. It was strange, doing something normal again. The three-hour wait at home was agony. Finally, at 6:00 PM, I went back to the school to prepare for our first show that was going to start in an hour.

There was a long hallway blocked off for just the cast and crew. There were five sings posted saying “CAST AND CREW ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT”, and a kid stationed there to keep the parents out. You’d think that with the five signs, people would get the point, but apparently every parent thought he/she was special. At the far end of that hallway, hidden from the audience, the cast put on their costumes and make-up. That was basically all we did for the first forty-five minutes. Since I wasn’t in the cast, I just stood by and watched. How I wish I had brought a camera! During that forty-five minutes, a transformation occurred. Costumes, wigs, and make-up, and some baby powder turned everybody in the cast from modern-day teenagers into orphans, servants, and adults living in the 1930’s. Even the boys had to put on make-up!

When everybody was done, we had a meeting in Mr. T’s room. The directors reminded us to be loud and energetic, to project our voices. Mrs. C gave a a really emotional speech about how she is so proud of us, and how special we are to her. She said that every other member of her family had some sort of trophy or certificate on display in their house, something they were proud of. She was the only one who didn't have anything—because what she was proud of was us, the Annie cast and crew. Her family was out there that night, and she was really excited to show them how amazing we would be. After we all gave her a big round of applause, Mrs. W brought us back down to earth with her speech: turn off all cell phones, no food in the backstage area, be loud and articulate, ect. That was all. And then….it was time.

We were a few minutes late. By the time J---, G---, and I (the three Assistant Directors) ran up to the stage, the lights were already down. We gave a quick announcement welcoming everybody and reminding them to turn off their phones and routine things like that. I tried to sound welcoming by smiling and looking directly at the audience, instead of just reading monotonously from the sheet like J--- did. I felt not the least bit nervous, up there in front of almost three hundred people. The audience clapped, the introductory music started, and we all went to our assigned places. I was prompting (just in case the actors forget their lines), so I had the best seat: right in front of the people in the first row, at the very edge of the stage. And I didn’t even have to buy a ticket!

My job was to prompt, but the actors didn’t need me at all! There was a little slip-up when the butler accidentaly put the jacket on Daddy Warbucks upside-down. They fixed it, though, with the butler saying “sorry” and Daddy Warbucks saying “It’s alright, Drake. Everybody make mistakes.” That got a laugh out of the audience, because everybody knew that wasn't planned. Another opening-night mistake was when I went to help the stage crew, somebody else tripped over me. Carrying a table! She didn’t see me crouched behind her cleaning up the floor, so she almost fell on top of me. I was glad it was semi-dark because or else everybody would have seen me turn beet red in embarassment.

Aside from those two tiny slip-ups, our opening night went great! It was a little rusty: the actors skipped a few lines, the stage crew took a little too long between the transitions, and I sometimes felt that the singers weren’t energetic enough. However, for opening night, it was amazing! The audience didn’t see a lot of the mistakes, and with the ones they did see, they were very generous. They laughed during the parts that went wrong, because they knew it was our first time performing, so they weren’t too hard on us.

Friday: second show. The show with a full house, meaning every ticket was sold out. Every seat was filled. And sadly, it was our worst show out of all four. Things went the same as the day before, except we experienced lots of microphone trouble. The mikes were going on and off, sometimes working, sometimes not, and sometimes producing weird noises. That made everyone really worried, and because they were worried, they lost a lot of their happy energy. M---’s voice was shaky and nervous instead of confident and welcoming. At first, I thought it was just because of the mike trouble, but later I found out that she was really, really sick. She would nott have went to school that day if she did not have to perform in Annie.

Because of the mike trouble and M---’s sickness, we didn’t perform very well. The audience did not responde as well either. However, they still thought it was a really good show, despite all the mess-ups. I guess I just felt that it was really bad because I knew how good it could be. For a regular show, it was pretty good. Just not as good as it could’ve been. The only up side was that I brought a camera and took lots of pictures.

Saturday afternoon: our matinee performance. Our best performance out of all four. It was also the peformance that my parents attended so I was very excited. Before the show, the directors gave us a pep talk about how important it was for us to keep that energy and believability as all the other night. They said that usually, the third performance is the one with least energy and most mistakes, because people think they’re already really good at it and don’t pay as much attention to their acting as before. Opening night, everyone is excited. Friday night, because there was a big audience, everybody paid attention. But the matinee show is usually where people loose their spark. The directors praised everyone about how well they did on Friday, and said that they need to be exactly like Friday that afternoon. However, I disagreed. I really wanted to shout at everyone to be louder, have more energy, and during the pillow fight scene, to be more aggressive. However, being only an Assistant Director and not a teacher, I could not voice my valuable opinions.

It came as a big surprise, then, when we did so well that afternoon. Even the directors were surprised. They had expected the matinee show to be the worst, and it turned out to be the best. No slip ups occurred at all. Everybody was so energetic. All the actors were loud. The mikes gave us no trouble. Everything was perfect. It was a really smooth and clean performance. My mom was completely blown away. She had expected a crappy, middle-school show, and instead, she saw this amazing, professional, and intriguing performance. My mom does not get amazed very easily, so having her be amazed by our Annie performance was like being declared the winners of the Oscars.

Saturday night: last show. The show that all my friends came to. And it went pretty well! There was a tiny bit of mike trouble at the beginning of Act 1, but it quickly got fixed. Everything else was perfect. The only down part was that the audience was not as responsive as that afternoon. During the matinee show, not only did we perform well, our audience was the best. They laughed at all the jokes, and gasped at all the surprises. They responded exactly how we wanted them to. That night, they were a bit more silent. However, it was still pretty good! Our second best performance, by my opinion.

As we approached the end of the show, the mood within the cast and crew shifted. We were all aware that Annie was drawing to a close. Some of the 8^th graders who had been in all of our HMS productions since 6^th grade were getting a little teary-eyed, because it was our last year at HMS. When the bows started and the girl who played Annie came out to take a bow, we could see that her eyes were glittering with tears. Then, the bows were over. The audience dissipated. We went back to our “Cast and Crew Only” hallway, and changed out of our Annie costumes. In the girl’s changing room, everybody was crying. I wasn’t, but when I went in there and people started asking me for hugs, I started getting a stinging feeling behind my eyes too. So I quickly left the girl’s room, not wanting to cry in front of everyone.

We spent so much time rehearsing and practicing. We put so much energy into the shows. Performing them was the best thing ever. It was amazing being able to bring joy and entertainment to our audience. And then, BOOM, it was over. It was done so fast! What I wouldn’t give to live through those nights over and over again, to expereince that perfomance high I get whenever the house lights go down the stage light come on every night. But that wasn’t possible. I’m a student, not a professing Assistant Director. And now it’s time to go back to the normal student life again.