完美亚裔父母和孩子 |
送交者: 红墙 2004年06月28日15:58:32 于 [海 二 代] 发送悄悄话 |
赶写成长在美国天空下的孩子们时,看到儿子从什么地方收集来的“完美的亚裔父母”和“完美的亚裔孩子”。。。看过大笑,大笑之后有点愣神,面对十项标准,我们这些第一代移民亚裔父母和我们第二代移民亚裔孩子是怎样完美地了解对方的? 完美亚裔父母---从第二代移民孩子的观点看: 1。能放宽一点点“晚上七点准时睡觉!”的严厉家规。2。面对99分的成绩单,别问孩子那1分是怎么丢的!嗯?!3。别看到孩子的衣着打扮时就大呼小叫“哎呀!你—你—你—”4。别天天明显地暗示“哈佛”“耶鲁”“普林斯顿”大学多好多好,还假装孩子不知道5。别把孩子的哪怕一点点的隐私都向整个亚裔社区抖搂个没完6。当孩子选文科专业时,别老是追问孩子“你以后可怎么办啊?”7。别给儿子剃个茶壶盖头或让女儿留两英亩的刘海儿,还觉得蛮不错8。别把不善交际的孩子硬塞进你安排好的约会中,让他们尴尬死!9。跟孩子说话,别只有一句话“你学习没有?”,加点别的点缀的句子不成?!10。别穷追不舍地盯问每个孩子大于21岁的朋友:“你有男/女朋友了吗?” 对照上述标准,我发现新一代中国移民(尤其这帮改革开放之后出来的),几乎接近完美亚裔父母的标准了,原因如下: 1。别提7点睡觉了!孩子12点前老实离开计算机就不错了!2。全A的孩子是有,但还是少数不是,多数在89分左右晃动。。。问一分去哪里了没用,还有10分丢在哪里我们也不知道啊3。孩子一个星期才换一次裤子,懒得“啊呀”了4。还没张口,孩子就说知道了:哈佛是不错,但我不去,成不?我去MIT5。说他不爱刷牙来着。。。算不算?6。孩子打算学“政治科学”。我说:爱啥啥的,以后别伸手向我要钱就成7。孩子不要茶壶盖,要一马平川的脑袋,或者染发!8。父母安排约会?别逗了!9。从来没机会问“你学习了没有”,人家孩子搭理你不?9。正耐心等待着他满21岁 完美亚裔孩子---从第一代移民父母的观点看: 1。SAT满分16002。弹钢琴/拉小提琴,而且一定要到演奏的水平3。申请并被27所大学录取4。一定要到常春藤大学读书,还要拿到足够的奖学金5。四个爱好:学习,学习,弹钢琴/拉小提琴,学习6。喜欢古典音乐,厌恶在电话上没完没了的聊天7。成为西屋奖,总统奖和罗德学者奖获得者8。立志成为脑外科专家9。与一位亚裔医生/博士结婚,然后培养出完美成功的孩子(第三代)10。特感兴趣父母小时候艰苦奋斗的故事,尤其是赤脚上学,走50多里路哇 相对于完美亚裔孩子的标准,我儿子百分之九十不合格,SAT没满分,既不会弹钢琴也不会拉小提琴。只打算申请13.5所大学,并做好了10所不被录取的准备,其中八所是常春藤大学。爱好:计算机游戏,电子游戏,网上聊天,电话聊天等等。只有其中的一条。。。目前未知。。。算是有希望:那就是与一位亚裔医生/博士结婚,然后培养出完美成功的孩子(第三代)。我们从来不放弃对于完美的追求,有点希望就“以观后效”,否则岂不“百分之百”不完美了? 据儿子说:这个小文在亚裔孩子中挺流行,大家都心有灵犀一点通知道每句话后面的故事。我说我才明白什么叫stereotype。How to be the Perfect Asian American Parent (From the 2nd Generation Perspective)1. Be a little more lenient on the 7:00 P.M. curfew. 2. Don't ask where the other point went when your child comes home with a 99 percent grade on his/her report card. 3. Don't ai-yah loudly at your kid's dress habits.4. Don't blatantly hint about the merits of Habadu (Harvard), Yeil (Yale), or Purinsuton (Princeton). 5. Don't reveal all the intimate details of your kids’ life to the entire Asian community.6. Don’t ask your child, "What are you going to do with your life?" if he/she majors in a non-science field. 7. Don't give your son a bowl haircut or your daughter two acres of bangs.8. Don't try to set your kid up on a date in anticipation of their poor taste or inept social skills. 9. Incorporate other phrases besides, "Did you study yet?" into your daily conversations with your children. 10. Don't ask all 92 of your kid's friends over the age of 21 if they have a boy/girlfriend yet. How to be the Perfect Asian Kid (From the 1st Generation Perspective) 1. Score a perfect 1600 on the SAT. 2. Play the violin or piano on the level of a concert performer.3. Apply to and be accepted by 27 colleges. 4. Go to a prestigious Ivy League University and win enough scholarship money to pay for it.5. Have four hobbies: studying, studying, violin/piano, and studying. 6. Love classical music and detest talking on the phone. 7. Become a Westinghouse, Presidential, and eventually a Rhodes Scholar.8. Aspire to be a brain surgeon. 9. Marry an Asian-American doctor and have perfect, successful children. (For ah-ma, and ah-ba)10. Love to hear stories about your parents?childhood... especially the one about walking 20 miles to school without shoes. |
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