2015-05-31

【Aiden in English】

        Graduation is a critical milestone in life, especially for Chinese school. This is because the more boring it is, the more satisfactory learning Chinese forever is. The only thing was painful to witness a graduation when you’re not finished yet. Unfortunately, that was the case for me anyway.

        The term “bitter-sweet” is a weird phrase because sometimes, it’s “bitterer” than “sweet”. It’s far too bitter to see kids say final, polite goodbyes which on the inside seemed like “See you, suckers!” while I was burning to death in the audience under a glass roof. The sweet part was the fact that this time was a great hours worth of jokes with my friends. Hey! We were bored, okay? Besides, do adults actually think they can get 200, sweaty, loud kids that don’t even give a crap to cooperate? Well, pigs will fly and the world will end before that happens, so good luck! For all the more sensible people, you see my point. If the school wants us to know that these “great” kids are graduating, it isn’t cool to rub it in our faces. There are more useful things I could be doing on a perfectly find Sunday than get heat stroke and dehydration while all the graduates blabbed on about their “amazing” experience. I don’t want to be a hypocrite, but I’ll probably have to lie in the same way. Wow, maybe the true feelings at the core aren’t always a pleasant idea for sharing. I guess sometimes the truth can hurt, and it’s better to judge a book by its cover.

        It’s not just the audience feeling discomfort, but the graduates as well. As I guarantee you, some of them on stage have some dark thoughts as well, like “This is my final year. My mom is finally proud of me, and you decide to embarrass us on the last day?!!” or “You don’t have to drag anyone here to get bored to death. That’s genocide!” or “Man, these graduation uniforms surely are hot. I’ve once heard somewhere you can get heat-stroke in hot outfits.” What was even more humiliating was the fact that each student had video they had to share about their experiences at the Chinese school. Something told me that the content had to be positive. No way would these kids be so nice. 

        The graduation ceremony lasted good hours. To be honest, I like my new shirts not soaked in sweat, not to complain or anything. I also find that sweat has a salty taste. I guess now, the phrase is “bitter, sweet and salty”.

【紅霞譯文】

         “苦甜”這個術語本身組合怪異，因為“苦澀”嫉妒有時確實比“甜蜜”羨慕更加難受，“再見了，倒霉鬼！”沒有比目睹師哥學姐們外表看似珍重惜別但內心卻無法掩飾幸災樂禍的場面更令人酸楚，坐在玻璃窗下的我快要被炙熱的太陽燒焦。苦中找樂，大家沒忘自尋開心。嘿！同伴們百無聊賴，閒得慌成嗎？難道父母們真以為有本事把二百來號滿頭冒汗嘰嘰喳喳從不配合的孩童鎮住？假如果真如此，恐怕蠢豬會平步青雲，世界末日即刻來臨，咱走着瞧！聰明人一點就明，畢業生的確個個“了不起”，但犯不上在徒弟面前招搖過市。今天星期日我可以找其它更有興趣的事情來做，幹什麼都比在這裡中暑脫水強，何苦來聽前輩們顯擺自己“非凡”經歷，我可不想當偽君子，但將來有一天可能口不對心。哎喲，或許說真話的確犯忌，既然忠言逆耳有損自尊心，大家只要留神光鮮的外表足矣。

        其實不僅觀眾感覺不爽，畢業生也是如此，我敢說台上不少難兄難姐同樣牢騷滿腹。“這是最後一年，老媽終於能為我驕傲以我為榮，醜媳婦好不容易熬成婆？！！”“您不必再費神逼兒女過這種無聊透頂的日子，任意揮霍大好時光！”“哇塞，畢業服真棒，我好像在哪聽說過穿上這種帥氣的套裝難逃中暑下場。”更有甚者，每位畢業生提供了一段視頻錄像，現場與大家分享各自的學習生涯，據說內容要積極陽光，難怪畢業生說得比唱得動聽。

        畢業典禮持續了好幾個鐘頭。坦率地說，我喜歡今兒穿的這件新汗衫，涼快不熱，沒啥好抱怨的，身上的汗臭氣散發出一股咸了吧唧的味道，讓我透過“苦甜鹹”從羨慕嫉妒恨的情感之中嗅到人間百味。