2015-07-13

【Aiden in English】

        Today sounds easy in an ideal perfect world. Spit out information and let the kids suck it up. Every kid pays attention and the entire class participates in activities. But when reality comes into play, being forced to learn during summer break is anything but ideal for kids. As for being a teacher assistant, this is why I was hired.

        I have never babysat anyone in my entire life. Maybe technically I have on my baby cousin, but at least she listens. This was my first time ever being close to a teacher, and let’s just say that after today, I’m changing my career. Being the assistant, I had to take care of the kids so that they didn’t distract others during lessons. Now, if there is one thing to complain to the school, which I think there are many, it is supposed to separate the age groups. I happened to deal with a 6-year-old kid who would fake cry everytime we told him to: A) can you be a little quieter? or B) shut your yapping mouth. In the end, I was ordered to take him out, which I would happily take that statement with both meanings with pleasures. So I dragged him to the room next door, and watched him shoot down a platoon of starships. Apparently, he had a secret weapon as well: a marker. 

        However, that kid wasn’t the only issue. The next part sort of turns me into a hypocrite because I used to do that too, and it’s not something I’m proud of. A little girl came to the camp/summer school in the morning, and felt like a pain in the donkey. The girl was afraid of being left alone without her mom in a room of strangers. I don’t blame her since I wouldn’t want to be here either. But the second her mom left, she started bawling her eyes out. The worst was yet to come. 

        The reason I was here was to teach both Chinese Chess and Chinese Yo-Yo classes, neither of which went exactly as I wanted to. In Chinese Chess, only four kids actually played. The rest did other stuff, and hopefully that wasn’t because of me. But the true challenge came when I started to teach the Yo-Yo. You know, being a teacher requires you to get along with all kinds of kids in any situation. Well, that’s gonna be tough for me since when no one could correctly spin the Yo-Yo, I got … annoyed. I wasn’t doing anything wrong, and I was explaining the motions just like my teacher. I guess this year’s batch wasn’t as talented. I had to run around, managing all the kid’s problems. From my prospective, it was chaos. Some kid’s string was too long, another’s snapped. The three other kids were chanting my name to teach them how the Yo-Yo as it turning while spinning it, and my answer was: “Follow the direction of the Yo-Yo as it turns! I can’t hand you everything!” The other teacher assistants were useless too, because they were a part of the silly group. I can’t ever trust anyone else to do my own work. Being a teacher is a lot harder, you see. When students don’t get something, then I get every vexed because I’m failing to do my job. I think now I know why teachers always want you to cooperate. It’s their job, if the students don’t learn and you are a bad teacher. That’s probably why this career was erased. Being a teacher doesn’t just require a good explanation, you need to have faith in the students to get good grades. This job relies too much on the laziest people in our society, and the fact that my career running on a bunch of kids is sort of, oh, scary.

        In an ideal world, everything will go your way. You can pick your job and be good at it. But it’s tough when the job you want to be good at doesn’t depend on how good you do it, but how good someone else does. 

        Here is attached a quote about the teaching principle. “Effective teaching strikes a delicate balance between the self confidence that students must develop to become independent thinkers and the humility they must maintain to recognize how much more they have to learn. In this process, moreover, it is not so much the intellectual superiority of the teacher that counts as it is his maturity in facing the unknown and his willingness to leave unanswerable questions unanswered.”

【红霞译文】

        对于生活在一个理想而完美世界的人来说，今天跟往常一样觉察不出什么特别的地方，发出通知，要求每个小朋友全力以赴参加集体活动。但实际上在暑假期间，真正对那些被迫来参加夏令营的顽童实施这些规定谈何容易，当然这也是为什么我被雇来作助教的原因。

        我从未当过保姆帮人看管小孩，也许认真地说我曾经带过自己的小不点表妹，起码她很听话。这辈子好不容易挨到今天才冠冕堂皇干点跟教师沾边的事情，不料我却改变了主意，从今往后与教师职业无缘。身为助教，我必须照看孩子，让他们在学习时保持精力集中。话说至此，假如允许提一个意见（其实还有很多），我倒觉得夏令营应该按年龄分组。碰巧我手下有一位年仅六岁的淘气包，每逢要他安静一会或者别再叽叽哇哇叫个不停的时候，他立马装哭，结果我只好按要求带他离开教室，其实单凭他个色表现早该这么处理。我拽着他去了隔壁教室，眼瞅他消灭一个兵团虚构的飞船，看来他手中还握有秘密武器：记号笔杆子。

        然而这个淘气包不是唯一添乱的家伙，另一位小姑娘让我觉得自己倒像个正人君子，虽说平日经常这么做，但并非出自本意。小姑娘早晨来上夏令营／暑期培训班时纠结万分，因此舍不得离开妈妈而去跟满屋子陌生面孔的人混在一起，我非常理解她的心情，因为我也不愿意呆在这个地方，等她母亲刚一转身，小姑娘瞪大眼珠，扯开嗓门嚎啕大哭起来，后头还有好戏可看。

        我到这里的原因是来讲授中国象棋和抖空竹两门才艺课，其实哪一门进行得都不随意。中国象棋课上，仅有四个孩子乐意动手，其他学生各干各的，但愿不是因为我才这么做。真正考验我的是从教大家抖空竹开始，谁都知道作为老师，不管任何场合都应该善于跟各种类型的学生相处，对我而言，这可不是一般性的挑战，尤其在没人能够拿捏得当让空竹转动的时候，我开始……起急。错不在我，我已经照着自个老师的样子讲解了空竹运作机制，大概由于这帮学生缺乏悟性，所以我只好手把手地教，一个示范接着一个示范地做。站在我这个角度，那场景可真够乱成一锅粥，有的孩子线绳过长，有的线绳缠到一起，另有三个孩子索性直呼本人大名要学空竹抖动起来以后打转的技巧，我直言相告：“先顺着空竹转动的方向抖起来再说！甭想一口吃成胖子！”别的助教一点也帮不上忙，因为他们跟这些学生半斤八两，我委实不能依赖任何人。你看当园丁有多辛苦，假如学生犯糊涂，那我心里跟着发毛，因为说明自己没有胜任本职工作。直到现在我才明白为什么老师们总要求学生有合作精神，老师的职责就是教书育人，如果学生学的不好，那么老师罪责难逃，怪不得教师行业停滞不前，因为人们看重的不是老师授课水平，而是学生的考试能力，但在当今社会里，这类工作好坏过分依赖懒人表现。这不，我的职业生涯成败完全取决于眼前这帮愣头青一举一动，天呀，太可怕了。

        理想的人生本应事事如愿，你可以根据特长选择职业，但伤脑筋的是，工作做得好坏并非取决于你个人能力，而是取决于别人的参与程度。

        顺便附上一个放之四海而皆准的教学原则：“卓有成效的教学在于加强学生独立思考能力及其信心，培养他们对所学领域不断进取的欲望。 因此在整个过程中，重要的并非是教师本身具备的广博学识，而是教师如何面对未知并对无法解答的问题充满热情。”