2016-01-24

【Aiden in English】

        2016 so far has been a letdown. I didn’t get a single 105% on any tests or make an NFL team. 2016 didn’t even give me the winning ticket to the 1.5 billion-dollar Powerball in January. And of all people, it’s given to a guy who dies the next day. The least the New Year could provide was a little flurry of snow, right?

        Well, the flurry turned out to be a lot more than “a flurry” in the Great Philadelphia Area, and the year 2016 suddenly got a ton cozier, which is quite odd, considering the snow was anything but. The high temp of that faithful Saturday was thirty degrees in Fahrenheit at noon, not that the sun was out. The blizzard kicked in the day before, lasting throughout the night and into Saturday’s evening. By then, a good two feet and five inches had fallen, adding on the snow stacked up with the gusts of wind.

        Unfortunately, it snowed on a Saturday, which meant the amount of missed school days deflated like the New England Patriots football. Speaking of football, fortunately, it snowed on a Saturday, which meant no Chinese School on Sunday. In turns, I was able to watch AFC and NFC Championships at home, eating chips, and hoping the Patriots lose, which they did. It actually turned out pretty well, considering I was totally going to flunk the weekly quiz in Chinese School. Hey, I’m a procrastinator. Mom yelled at me for being lazy, and I yelled back at saying how I was the one that had to eat all the dishes grandma cooked, since no one else did. I also used the excuse that the NFC Championship game was close (it wasn’t; the Arizona Cardinals got crushed 15-49 by Carolina Panthers). Trust me, it works every time, especially when mom doesn’t even know where the scoreboard is to check if I’m lying (ha-ha). In addition, I could always flip the channel to a nerdy show starring the ghost of Albert Einstein that talked about E=MC2 and the quantum entanglement. Boy, mom would let me quit piano if I actually learned from those shows, which I never do. However, the stuff sounds cool, though.

        Peyton Manning ended up beating Tom Brady. After my celebration and jeering at the NE Patriots, I gave them some credit at putting up 336 yards against the Denver Bronco’s stunning defense, with an astonishing 292 of them coming through the air. Then looking at the two picks thrown by Brady, the 20 hits he got and the four quarterback sacks, I started laughing at the Patriots again. The snow day delivered a gift I never would’ve imagined. I potentially could’ve gotten to see the final Brady-P. Manning match-up ever, as I’m telling you that Peyton is getting old. At least he’s still got another chance at a Super Bowl to go.

【红霞译文】

        迄今为止，2016年一直有负众望，我既未拿过一个105分考试成绩，也无缘问津国家橄榄球联盟球队，甚至连一张壹月份火爆出炉的15亿美元强力球彩票都指望不上，倒是目睹了不少一夜暴富的幸运者第二天命归西天。还好新年新气象，大自然欣然送来片片雪花，不是吗？

        是啊，晶莹剔透的雪花漫天飞舞，东海岸大费城地区到处银装素裹，2016年老天爷突然慷慨激昂，真叫我有点消受不起。原本靠得住的星期六中午气温不过华氏卅度／摄氏零下一度，太阳趁机溜之大吉，而暴风雪早在前一天就已经付诸行动，并连夜重兵集结，星期六又从白天到晚间持续鏖战，再加上狂风肆虐，两天后鸣金收军时，积雪已达到29英寸／74厘米。

        不幸的是，下大雪那天恰逢星期六，这就意味着学校放假的希望如同新英格兰爱国者队员手中撒气的橄榄球趋于渺茫。既然说起橄榄球，我由衷感叹暴风雪来的正是时候，言外之意星期天中文学校不得不关门停课，由此说来，我可以堂而皇之地居家观看美国橄榄球联合会和国家橄榄球联合会两场冠军争夺战，一边咀嚼薯条垃圾，一边做着黄粱美梦，期待爱国者队被淘汰出局，结果如愿以偿，真是天助我也，否则哪有时间迎战每周一次的中文测验。嘿，我喜欢临阵磨枪。妈妈抱怨我懒惰成性，而我据理力争，责怪家里只有我一人毫无条件地消灭掉外婆所做的每道饭菜。我争取摆事实讲道理，国家橄榄球联合会角逐难解难分，实际上15比49，亚利桑那红雀队被卡罗来纳黑豹队打得落花流水。相信我好了，每次搪塞妈妈都不成问题，即使我成心蒙人，妈妈绝对搞不清比分牌面朝何方，哈哈。除此而外，我不停地将电视频道转换到书呆子节目台上，装扮成爱因斯坦的幽灵出任主角，高谈阔论E=MC2能量守恒定律及量子纠缠。天哪，即使妈妈同意我放弃钢琴来钻研电视剧所传授的奇葩学问，打死我也做不到，然而，里面涉及的内容乍听上去确实有趣。

        四分卫培顿·曼宁击败了汤姆·布雷迪，我在庆祝之余少不了拿新英格兰爱国者开涮，但实事求是地说，他们紧逼防守出色的丹佛野马队336码，其中292吗来自空中传球。再来回顾布雷迪投掷的被截住的两个球、廿次被对方球员冲撞的场面以及四次四分卫擒杀，爱国者队令我忍俊不禁。暴风雪天给我送来了难以想象的礼物，让我有可能亲眼目睹布雷迪和曼宁之间最后一次交锋，我告诉你吧，曼宁到了岁数，但至少他另有一次机会参加美国橄榄球超级杯决赛。