午飯後又獨自出去散步。 天氣很和暖，我只穿了一件薄毛衣, 雙手插在褲兜里，頭微微仰着，享受着午後的陽光。我隨意地望着高樓之間的天空，很悠閒地踱着步子，思緒在雲間漫遊。

冷不丁身邊傳來一個聲音：“Are you lost?”

我從天際收回目光，原來是一個男人在問我。

“Oh, no, I am just enjoying the moment.” 我莞爾。其實, I was indeed lost a moment ago - I was lost in my own thoughts.

我指了指前方的一棟高樓：“My office is right there.”

男人也笑了：“So you can’t be lost. My ex-girlfriend’s office is also in that building.”

我跟男人道了別，繼續我的散步，慢慢踱到了海邊，視野豁然開朗。

那個男人的問題卻在我腦海里揮之不去：Are you lost?

人生的旅途中，回首長長的來路，面對茫茫的未來，你可曾暫緩急急追趕的腳步，停下來問問自己：“Where am I going? Am I lost?”

想起最近看的一齣電影： “A Walk on the Moon” （1999). 我把它連續看了兩遍。

下面是Marcy Dermansky的一段影評：

“A Walk on the Moon” stars Diane Lane as Pearl Kantrowitz, a Jewish housewife in 1969 who married at the age of seventeen and still curls her hair in the summer of love.

The family goes to the Catskills for the summer. Husband Liev Schreiber has to work during the week, teenage daughter Anna Pacquin hates her parents, and there’s also the youngest son, a little boy who gets stung by wasps. Pearl finds herself inexplicably attracted to the blouse man (Viggo Mortensen) who sells his wears at the Catskills resort. The blouse man! He gives her a tie dye shirt and touches her shoulder, and Pearl’s lost.

It’s a small movie-- but how many films are about a woman’s sexual awakening? A film that puts a woman’s desire before family without offering a moral judgment or offering a male fantasy? Pearl’s journey into adultery is not without consequence, of course, and she pays for the bliss she experiences under a waterfall. Diane Lane’s per????ance is lovely, her pain and pleasure achingly real.

Liev Schreiber also turns in the most sympathetic portrait of a cuckolded husband available on film. The Summer of Love is handsomely recreated including the Neil Armstrong's moonwalk and the Woodstock festival. ”

每個人都有迷失的時刻，不僅僅限於婚外戀.

電影裡Pearl的女兒Anna 發現了Pearl的婚外情，質問她的媽媽：“I am the teenager, not you! You had your chance!”

Pearl說：“No, I didn’t.” Anna 是Pearl第一次和第一個男朋友，也就是如今的丈夫Liev，上床的產物。Anna的出生徹底改變了Pearl和Liev的人生軌跡。

Pearl的婆婆也 發現了Pearl的婚外情， 她問Pearl：“Why? Do you think you are the only one who has dreams that didn’t come true?” 她告訴Pearl，因為Pearl的懷孕，Liev也失去了夢寐以求的上大學的機會。

Liev 得知Pearl的婚外情後，無比痛苦地說：“It is not my dream to work in a shop fixing TVs…It is OK, because I thought I have gotten the most important thing right in my life – I have you. But now I don’t!”

是啊，每個人都有沒來得及實現的夢想。但你生命中最重要的是什麼？What do you want most?

很多文學電影都表達了這一主題。 So many people don’t know what they want. So many people never give a thought to what they really want. They let other people make decisions for them and conveniently blame others for undesirable consequences. They let themselves trapped in sticky situations. They have no guts to choose, to let go, to hold on, or to stand up.

在“The Horse Whisperer馬語者”里，紐約來的大編輯Annie愛上了蒙大拿的牛仔Tom. Tom問Annie：“I know what I want… Do you know what you want?” Annie當時不能答。She was lost then. Sometimes people thought they knew what they want, but actually they don’t. It is not easy to truly know yourself.

今天一個中國男子對我說，he is a developing man from a developing country. 他指的是他的精神世界still developing。

We are all developing, evolving, and awakening. Are you lost during the process?

When you are lost, please take your time and search deeply into your heart: What do you really want for YOUR life?