2015-02-21

【Aiden in English】

       As we walked out of Serafina Fabulous Pizza with full, yet queasy stomachs, Mom led us to the Metropolitan Museum of Art (MMA). I don’t know about you, but the world history isn’t a 12-year-old boy’s favorite to learn on Saturday, if we even learn on Saturday. Even if history were our favorite subject, the library would have 24-hour service.  Besides, the MMA only has art. So if we were going there, it would take hours to read the small summaries next to each artwork. But no matter what I did try to change my mom’s thought, she would budge even an inch.

        Mom had gotten us the audio headphones and a gadget of some sort to give us a description of certain pictures. It didn’t take Einstein to figure out what the gadget was, because the size, battery sign, and time gave it away. The “gadget” was an iPod, just in a plastic case and the iPod stuck to one app. As I scrolled through all the guides and instructions, the MMA seemed larger than ever.

        Where to start? It’s the question, isn’t it? Well, it’s certain if you have three hours to tour the MMA. It’s so big that you could spend an entire day exploring. Literally, that’s the description the iPod told me about. So instead of picking a random place to begin, we went to the nearest entrance we could find to the vast maze of art. We plopped in the middle of Greek & Roman Art that my friend Kevin was currently learning in his social study at the 6th grade, while I was wondering about Ancient India in my school district at the same time. 

        As soon as I scanned the gallery, I saw a ton of small, black and bolded numbers. The screen would then have a narrator lecture on and on about a piece of artwork after pressed the corresponded number on iPod. His voice also sounded very lame and droopy and made me feel like falling asleep in class when the teacher talked about how grass grew or paint dried. So Kevin and I were just standing at a bowl with many paintings on it and listening to an old man talk about how people were playing a sport. I thought the iPod helped me to know what it’s going on. With my imagination, the person holding the spear was trying to poke someone in the back. It would’ve been rude, but now I could also see how the people were playing a sport of Who-Can-throw-A-Spear-Farther game. Yet when the curator finished talking, both moms became just a puff of smoke. Down the hall at the end of the gallery, I caught a glimpse of our moms turning the corner. We raced to catch up, barely looking around us. Kevin and I caught up to them, and they said we were only going to scan things. I would’ve hugged her right then and there. I didn’t know about you, but if we stopped to hear a lecture on everything of the largest museum in the US, I rather eat uncooked frozen carrots. 

        The Ancient Greek section continued onto statures of men with six packs, each with a history of three things, a winner in the Olympics or sports, a warrior, or a king/god. The statures were all white, but in different sizes. In the hallway, huge marble figures loomed over us, while in the next exhibition room was a shriveled up old man who didn’t fit my overall assumption. I didn’t have time to listen to the iPod explain because moms and the others were in and out as fast as lighting. All I did catch was that he was missing a hand.

        We sped out of Greek & Roman Art and blasted into the European Paintings of the 13^th-19^th century. Rooms split into intersections, and paintings lined the walls everywhere. Getting lost was easy. After a while, all the paintings looked the same. But when things started looking the same, differences became more obvious. As we wandered through rooms and rooms of the gallery, I noticed the differences between painters. Some painters drew strokes like waves, easy and peaceful, yet others painted with erratic strokes, making sharp edges. Also, paintings varied from chaotic scenes like war to calm backdrops of beaches. In those chaotic war paintings, there was so much to take in. It seemed almost as if the artist wanted to overwhelm the viewer with swords, explosion and most of all uniforms. While in those calm beach paintings, the artists painted with smooth curves of waves and sand colliding over and over again, almost hypnotizing me when I saw it. Although these were small variations, I kept walking until a painting stood out. Now when I said chaotic before, I meant kind of chaotic but neat enough to know what it was. Whoever painted this picture, I didn’t even know if “neat” was in his vocabulary. The highlight was added to increase the brightness. Different shades of gray were splattered over. It looked like a child painted by flinging the paint brush everywhere. If I closely looked at, other colors emerged like red, green, and yellow. Again, it was only a glance because Mom had paid her visit many times over the years and she flew along through rooms. I followed her, and Kevin followed me. 

        The next room had a painting of “Wolf and Fox Hunt” that stood out even to Mom. It was a picture of a man hunting with his dogs by Flemish Baroque Painter Peter Paul Rupens (1557-1640). Yet there was a wolf fighting two soldiers with other wolves fighting the foxes. It reflected one of those chaotic paintings with death and sharp stuff, which was not something you wanted to see before bed.

        As we finally finished a circle back to the place where we started, the four of us took a break. Our legs and brain became sore, and just ahead was another few long adventures of cultures to go.

【紅霞譯文】

        在六翼天使巨無霸皮薩店飽餐過後，大家的胃口早已被撐得滴水不進，這時媽媽率領我們直奔紐約大都會藝術博物館。不知你怎麼認為，對於一位不滿十二歲的男生來說，幹嗎要在星期六跟自己過意不去，即使非得占用周末時間，犯不上拿世界史開刀，如果真的因為喜愛歷史而想強化學習，還有圖書館甘做後盾，那是一天廿四小時晝夜開放免費為民服務的文化場所，而大都會藝術博物館充其量只與藝術相關。且不講我們先要長途跋涉趕往那裡，再花上大把精力摳叱清楚所有藝術作品旁那些小了吧嘰的註解說明，可事先無論我怎麼費盡口舌，都難以打動媽媽，她始終堅持己見寸步不讓。

        媽媽為我們每人預定了音頻耳機解說器，戴上它可以了解有關展品背景，即使你不是愛因斯坦，同樣知道怎麼使用這玩意兒，因為單憑其外觀大小、充電容量以及使用長短就不難做出個人選擇，它就是蘋果牌數碼多媒體播放器，小小的塑料盒內安裝有軟件應用程序，我馬上把裡面的參觀攻略與介紹指南橫掃一遍，方知大都會藝術博物館要比想象的大得多。

        從哪兒入手呢？這下問題來了，難道不對嗎？假如你計劃用三個鐘頭涵蓋全館，那麼這個問題肯定首當其衝，大都會藝術博物館規模宏大，怎麼着都得花掉整天的功夫，解說器也強調這一點。因此，與其漫無邊際地閒逛，不如擇近走入古希臘古羅馬藝術展廳，恰好也是同齡發小好友藝博目前六年級社會學所學內容，而我的學校正側重世界四大文明古國之一印度。

        我放眼環視古希臘古羅馬藝術展廳，面前出現一堆密密麻麻既小又黑還粗的編號，只要在解說器輸入相應的號碼，熒光屏講解員便開始滔滔不絕地講述起來，其聲調枯燥低沉，宛如課堂上老師談論綠草如何生長或者油漆怎麼變干一樣，令我昏昏欲睡。於是，我和藝博來到一口大碗旁，上面附有不少圖畫，我們一邊觀摩，一邊聆聽老先生介紹當年人們如何參加體育運動，我覺得解說器有助於拉近參觀者與作品的距離，激發人的想象力，畫中人手握長矛正試圖直戳對手的後背，這麼做雖有失常理，但現在至少我明白了扔標槍遊戲是怎麼來的。聽完解說員講解，兩位媽媽一溜煙跑得無影無蹤，在展廳的盡端拐角處，我好不容易捕捉到她倆的身影，咱哥們兒急起直追，顧不上多貓一眼身邊的展品。待我和藝博跟了上來，才被告知要加快步伐。知子莫如母啊，這話可說到了我心坎上去，不知你作何感想，總而言之，如果真的叫我逐一聽完全美最大的博物館各種介紹，我情願立地自罰吞下生硬冰凍令人作嘔的胡蘿蔔。

        我們繼續沿古希臘館向內延伸直至腹肌發達的美男雕像群，其中每位都與以下三件事情密不可分：奧林匹克能手、戰將或國王即上帝，全部從白色大理石雕刻而成，只不過大小各異。走廊上風度翩翩的巨型雕塑隨處可見，展廳內間或出現老態龍鐘的長者，與前面我所描述的形成了鮮明對照。我來不及聆聽詳細解說，因為大家進進出出猶如閃電一般穿梭，最後只容我看到一尊斷臂人雕像。

        我們速戰速決，很快轉入十三—十九世紀歐洲繪畫展廳。展廳之間設有隔斷，四周牆壁掛滿了名門流派的各家代表，乍看上去大同小異，但實際上風格不一。我們從一個展室走出，立刻又走進另一個展室，逐步意識到畫家之間格調上的差別：有的畫鋒平滑，靜如微波蕩漾，“江作青羅帶，山如碧玉篸”；有的則古道西風，構圖突兀蒼勁，“為草當作蘭，為本當作松”。從馳騁疆場到恬靜海濱，各路繪畫手法紛紛亮相：反映殘酷戰爭的作品刀光劍影，到處呈現殺氣騰騰的景象；表現湖光山色的作品柔情似水，海波簇擁浪花拍打着沙灘，纏綿得催我入睡。即使同類展品也獨有特色，我接着往前走一直走到後面一幅畫前才停下了腳步。在此我想解釋先前所言的混亂場面並非亂塗一氣，相反其中每幅作品下筆乾淨利落，足以讓人領悟畫家所要表達的意境，不管畫家是誰，也不知道畫家是否認可“乾淨利落”，總之，高光部位線條明亮，與周圍灰色陰影形成強烈對比，好像孩童隨筆塗鴉一氣呵成；如果走近端詳，我不難發現紅綠黃三色從畫面凸顯出來。當然，我本來就是一位來去匆匆的過往行客，再加上媽媽早年來過多次，知道自己喜歡的東西，我只好腳踩媽媽的足跡，而藝博則步我之後塵。

        下個展廳有一幅“獵取狼與狐狸”竟然高度吸引了媽媽的眼球，這幅油畫出自比利時巴洛克畫派彼得·保羅·魯本斯（1577生—1640卒）之手，描繪了獵手及其獵狗野外狩獵場景，動作猛烈，色彩鮮明，生動地再現狼與士兵、狼與狐狸之間的殊死搏鬥，可納入上述眾多混戰作品之列，睡覺前最好不要欣賞這類作品。

        我們一行四人終於重新回到博物館大廳稍事休息，這時只覺得渾身上下酸痛不已，後面將有幾個精彩的藝術展廳正等待我們繼續探索。