2015-06-16

【Aiden in English】

        And I thought the lemons were taking over the world. Well, when witnessed the activity on Crete in the Aegean Sea of Greek, the olive headquarter of the operations, a contest was quickly approaching for those two plants. Crete is the most southerly point in Europe and filled with lush olives, and I think that they might have a shot at beating the lemons to a common goal: world domination.

        The island of Crete is the biggest island in Greece and has 41 million olive trees. Each tree produces more olives. Their numbers grow by the day, and there seems to be virtually no barriers in their way. I said “virtually”! The lemons have their own spies in the world to stop potential competitors in their tracks. With the rising threats of the olives, these spies are sending some…… “friends”. The olives are now being shipped out by the millions and are brought to execution facilities where the olives are crushed slowly, and the blood is collected and bottled. It’s then sold to the world at a high price, and the money influences more people to buy. The lemons lower the price, attracting more people to buy. When the demand for the olives rises, the more olives cripple. They are being plucked off their branches quicker than ever. But this trap was set by the very ancient olives themselves thousands of years ago. They have created a great story of gods and monsters. Only thing was, it was true. It started with the meeting of sky and earth or Uranus and Gaia, giving birth to the Titans. The Titans then brought the gods into the world. However, only had the gods revolt against themselves, ending an era and starting another. This great story caught the attention of the world, alerting the entire population of earth directly to Crete. The olives have activated a defense of their own. Around the world, the temperature starts rising. Humans thought of this as a natural phenomenon, but really it was just a protocol activated during the Ice Age. It is known as global warming. The heat of the world raised the olive production, and also made tourists loss interest in coming to Crete for buying the olives.

        5,000 years ago, another battle between the lemons and the olives raged. This time the battle took place in the ancient Greek fortress called the Palace of Knossos. Both sides suffered great losses and the olives fended off the lemons. The Palace of Knossos was an enormous complex at the time, containing 5 levels, over 1,400 intimate rooms, a marvel of frescoes, Minoan relief figures and murals on plaster, and graceful columns. This architectural wonder was home of the mythical Minotaur. The palace was made by the King Minos, the son of Zeus. It was a sacred place, and that’s why lemons couldn’t attack the island from then on. The sacred grounds protected the olives from the lemons because Zeus was born here, bringing olives with him. Zeus then protected Crete from any attack, godly or… lemon-ly. Unfortunately his powers were failing, and the struggle raged once again. And the end result might be a world without one or the other.

        The rivalry between the olives and the lemons can’t be settled without bloodshed, which in this case is juice-shed. When the day comes, and the war ends, we… there won’t be that day. So it’s every man for himself. 

【红霞译文】

        我本以为只有柠檬一统天下，但当来到爱琴海希腊克里特岛橄榄腹地亲眼目睹植被概貌时，我立刻感到橄榄气势磅礴，这个位于欧洲最南端的岛屿几乎掩映在郁郁葱葱的橄榄树林之中。如同柠檬一样，橄榄正席卷全球。

        克里特岛是希腊最大的岛屿，拥有4100万棵橄榄树，每棵都硕果累累，并且数量与日俱增，看起来好像自然繁衍，没错儿，“好像”如此。这下柠檬棋逢对手，终于碰到橄榄这个半路杀出来的程咬金。随着竞争白热化，橄榄也亦步亦趋深入“敌”后，数以百万计的橄榄果子被运到工厂脱皮加工，其汁液装瓶打包，再以高价行销世界各个角落，有了钱可以说服更多的顾客购买，而柠檬则靠的是薄利多销。橄榄油需求提高，橄榄产量相继增大，采摘频率比过去加快了很多，但这种策略部署早在几千年前就已经形成，自古以来橄榄油一向根据供需关系生产，希腊因此还创造出众神与恶魔的故事，听上去荡气回肠。盘古开天，苍穹之神乌拉诺斯与大地女神盖亚生下泰坦，泰坦把诸神带进了这个世界，但却被后辈神灵彻底推翻，一个时代的灭亡标志着另外一个时代的兴起。这么动人的画面不能不引起全世界的极大关注，而克里特岛恰是整个故事的发源地。橄榄与时俱进，自身调整适应机制，以不变应万变，正如地球变暖，温室效应随冰期以后气温上升逐渐显现出来。这里的橄榄产量虽然有增无减，但游客却被热得望而却步。

        5000年前柠檬和橄榄之间的竞争已经难解难分，这回索性把战场搬进名叫“克诺索斯宫殿”的古希腊城堡，双方损失惨重，橄榄干脆把柠檬挡在墙外。克诺索斯宫殿规模巨大，有五层平台，超过一千四百多间居室，至今依然保留撼世珍品米诺斯石膏人物浮雕、绘画及擎天石柱，希腊神话中的牛头怪曾出生在这个奇葩建筑里。整个宫殿根据米诺斯国王的旨意兴建而成，米诺斯是神王宙斯的儿子，遂之成为神圣的地方。从那时起，柠檬再也无法在这片土壤上攻击橄榄，圣地是橄榄经久不衰的后盾，因为宙斯早年在克里特岛诞生的时候，橄榄相伴左右，从那以后，宙斯一直福佑克里特岛不被外界神化的或……柠檬式的侵犯。不幸的是，宙斯神力逐日衰竭，对立面重新揭竿而起，争来斗去的结果不是你死就是我活。

        橄榄和柠檬之间的争斗非打得头破血流汁液满地不可，届时大家才会消停下来。当然我们……不会看到这一天出现，因此双方继续自以为是。