大赞正明兄译作，满篇珠玑，美不胜收！赏析几句（写在 --- 号后面）：


（印度）罗宾德拉纳特·泰戈尔著  傅正明译

I, who have the amphibious duality of nature in me, whose food is in the West and breathe air in the East, do not find a place where I can build my nest. I shall suppose I shall have to be a migratory bird and cross and recross the sea, owning two nests, one on each shore.
--Rabindranath Tagore

From A Letter to William Rothenstein  (July 6, 1917)

我有天生的水陆两栖特性，食物在西方，气韵在东方，找不到一片可筑巢之地。我想像自己乃是一苹候鸟，将一再穿越大海，此岸彼岸，各有一个巢。

--- “do not find a place where I can build my nest.”这句里面的“do not find”不是“不能”，而是“不欲”，而译文之“找不到一片可筑巢之地”中的“找不到”却是“不能”。个见觉得有偏差。看英文原文，是这鸟不愿意在某一个地方（a place）作窝，而希望在东西两边（each shore）各有一个窝。若说它“找不到”，无论它是东边的还是西边的鸟，它都不能own a nest，可它却说要own two nests，说明“找得到”。

1
STRAY birds of summer come to my window to sing and fly away.
And yellow leaves of autumn, which have no songs, flutter and fall there with a sigh.
夏日漂飞鸟，落我窗前歌拂晓，鼓翼上青杳。
秋天黄叶多，萧然无语随风落，叹息代骊歌。
--- 译作非常精彩，比英文原作典雅生动。

2
O TROUPE of little vagrants of the world, leave your footprints in my words.
世界小歌队，漂飞向九陲，
请君鸿爪印，入我墨香池。
--- 最后两句太妙了！words是虚词，脚印是实词，二者在新诗里比较容易配伍，古典诗词中不大接受这类比喻。可是，让鸿爪印踏入砚池，再踩到笺上就可以了。哈哈


3
THE world puts off its mask of vastness to its lover.
It becomes small as one song, as one kiss of the eternal.
其一
浩瀚梵天大面具，诗心生爱便屏除，
寰球丸结一谣曲，亲吻玉成千古书。
--- 一看英文原文就知道不大好译，因为比喻都是适合新诗的，所谓的形象思维。


其二

大世界之辽阔兮，戴浩瀚之面具，见锺情之诗心兮，露真容而摘除，
其象貌之纤小兮，如短歌之一阙，其亲吻之甜蜜兮，作瞬间之永驻。
--- 韵味有点儿闻一多，用古文写新诗，有时很吃力。


4
IT is the tears of the earth that keep her smiles in bloom.

泪泉藏地底，不作浅流声，--- 不做浅流声 发挥得好！
破土绽微笑，开花播德馨。
--- 精彩！古韵盎然。

7

THE sands in your way beg for your song and your movement, dancing water. Will you carry the burden of their lameness?
江水掀波舞，泥沙问水娘∶
君能同步咏诗章，挟我难行瘸腿向东方？调寄南歌子
--- 原文寓意很深，但其风格太西方化了。译作尚佳。个人感觉这类洋诗比较难译，难为正明兄了。哈哈


11
SOME unseen fingers, like idle breeze, are playing upon my heart the music of the ripples.

不知何物如纤指，闲适徐来风暖吹，
搅动心灵一池水，无形有律起涟漪。
--- 好，流畅明快！


27
THE light that plays, like a naked child, among the green leaves happily knows not that man can lie.
晨光一束闹枝头，恰似儿童戏水流，
赤裸天真谁晓得∶人常哄骗鱼吞钩。
--- 英文原文极佳，译作恰堪匹敌！并赞！


48
THE stars are not afraid to appear like fireflies.
寒夜星光暗，望中若火虫，
微光不惮小，豆火可帮穷。
--- 译作小巧玲珑，典用得好，顿见灵气！


51
YOUR idol is shattered in the dust to prove that God's dust is greater than your idol.
尔曹偶像倒，落地作尘嚣。
一撮神造土，却可近崇高。
--- 英文很绕口啊。哈哈。译作深谙原文寓意，好！


54
LIKE the meeting of the seagulls and the waves we meet and come near. The seagulls fly off, the waves roll away and we depart.
相见宛如双鸟落，相随後浪吻前波。
海鸥飞去江潮退，你我各吟萍水歌。
--- 英文原文就像一个短小沉默的影片，个人感觉译文场景也保持沉默最好，把联想留给读者。


69
"I GIVE my whole water in joy," sings the waterfall, "though little of it is enough for the thirsty."
瀑布多情泻，如诗笑语传∶
一行能解渴，我却献全篇。
--- 最后两句比喻精彩，写一行已经意足，我偏献全篇者何？诗怀如涌也。

89

THE scabbard is content to be dull when it protects the keenness of the sword.
刀鞘守钝谨防误伤弱小，
剑芒藏锋翘待力斩凶顽。
--- 英文和译作虽着眼点有小异，都深含寓意，好！

就赏析到这儿，下面也细读了，越往下越精彩！稍暇再接着赏析。大谢正明兄分享佳作！非常成功！





104
THE music of the far-away summer flutters around the Autumn seeking its former nest.
夏日琴声向远方，寻踪求迹绕秋梁，
寒巢请问檐前鸟∶遗韵依然飘旧香？

107
THE echo mocks her origin to prove she is the original.
山谷回音如少女，噗嗤一笑对声源∶
我本天才原创者，请君侧耳听鸿篇。

226
THOSE who have everything but thee, my God, laugh at those who have nothing but thyself.
观世相，千金赃款意无上帝，轻笑他人贫困，
读经书，两袖清风心有神明，谨防自己肮脏。

269
I HAVE learnt the simple meaning of thy whispers in flowers and sunshine--teach me to know thy words in pain and death.
花心隐有呢喃语，日照深藏启悟书，
百义片言谁领会？含辛面死一寒儒。

288
LOVE'S pain sang round my life like the unplumbed sea, and love's joy sang like birds in its flowering groves.
一生情事苦，宛如大海难窥测，悲歌秋日里，
两地爱心甜，恰似鸣禽可噪喧，欢唱花丛间。

292
CLOUDS come floating into my life from other days no longer to shed rain or usher storm but to give colour to my sunset sky.
云起漂浮入我家，素心无意雨喧哗，
不兴风暴摧芳草，但为晚晴添彩霞。

308
CHEERLESS is the day, the light under frowning clouds is like a punished child with traces of tears on its pale cheeks, and the cry of the wind is like the cry of a wounded world. But I know I am travelling to meet my Friend.
今日少欢畅，阴云皱额头，光如童子泪潜流，受罚欲遮羞。
人哭伤兵燹，风号悲晚秋。我心庆幸一孤舟，正要会良俦。调寄巫山一段云  

321
I HAVE scaled the peak and found no shelter in fame's bleak and barren height. Lead me, my Guide, before the light fades, into the valley of quiet where life's harvest mellows into golden wisdom.

攀登直上高山顶，荣名寒寂荒芜岭，何处可遮身，四望无遁门。
光幽寻僻处，向导望溪谷∶秋稻若黄金，开镰收慧明。调寄菩萨蛮