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Ever wondered why it’s so hard to get men involved at church? Why less than 40% of the adults in your worship services are male? Why more than a fifth of married women in your congregation sit alone every Sunday? Why the really committed ones have names like Sarah, Andrea, Victoria and Lauren?

I studied this phenomenon for three years. What I learned drove me to write a book: Why Men Hate Going to Church (in bookstores March 24, or pre-order online). Be warned: what I found may shock you.

Most people assume that men are just less religious than women, but this is untrue. Other religions have little trouble attracting males. Jesus was a magnet to men. But today, few men are living for Christ, even as many are dying for Allah. Why do rival faiths inspire male allegiance, while ours breeds male indifference?

A business guru once said, “Your system is perfectly designed to give you the results you’re getting.” Christianity’s primary delivery system, the local church, is perfectly designed to reach women and older folks. That’s why our pews are filled with them. But this church system fails to stir men’s hearts, so men (especially masculine ones) stay away.

What do I mean? Most churches offer a safe, nurturing community, an oasis of stability and predictability. Studies show that women and seniors are the groups most likely to seek these things. Our comforting congregations provide women with what they long for, so naturally they show up in large numbers.

On the other hand, men and young adults are drawn to risk, challenge and daring. While our official mission is one of adventure, the actual mission of most congregations is making people feel comfortable and safe – especially longtime members (Pastors, can I have an amen?) Church insiders routinely block anything challenging or innovative because it might make people feel uncomfortable or unsafe. This caution keeps the peace in the short term, but it drives men and young adults away over the long term.

Then there’s our reputation as a place for little old ladies of both sexes. Many guys feel church is a “women’s thing.” Most men are introduced to Christianity by women – nuns, nursery workers, Sunday school teachers and mom. Boys meet a feminized Jesus – a tender, sweet man in a shining white dress. Most volunteer opportunities in church involve traditionally female roles: singing, sewing, cooking, caring for children, teaching, planning social gatherings, etc. There’s nothing for a guy to do – unless he has a passion for attending meetings or passing out bulletins.

Since guys are so useless in church, it begs the question: do we even need them? Yes! A lack of male participation is one of the surest predictors of church decline. The denominations with the biggest gender gaps are also those that have been losing members and shutting churches. On the other hand, churches with robust male participation are generally growing.

Bottom line: if you want a healthy church for the long term, attract men. This was Jesus’ strategy. It still works today. In my book I offer more than 60 pages of proven principles for creating a man-friendly church. To order your copy, click here. I also want to encourage you to visit our pastors’ forum:
http://churchformen.com/v-web/bulletin/bb/index.php