My son likes to do martyr type of things to make us feel guilty and get what he wants.
Wednesday morning he declares loudly that he wants to go eat at iHop, at the moment I thought it was OK and said:"All Right.". Later on my husband said he prefers to go on Thursday.
Later on when I came home from work Wednesday, I told my son that we are going on Thursday instead. He reacted huge - crying and threatening that he "will not do anything unless we go today." Some interesting conversations below:
Son:"I am not going to write Chinese homework, I am not going to practise piano, I am not even going to eat tonight."
I:"If that is what decision, I can only pray to God to help you change your mind."
Son:"You will be feeling sad and guilty because I am going to die without eating anything, then you will regret not going out to eat at iHop tonight."
I:"I will be sad but I am not in control of God's decision. If I am the chosen one doesn't mean you are the chosen one, if you are stiff-necked to disobey God's commandments, which is not honoring your parents by obeying them, and also kill yourself by not eating, for sure you could only go to hell and it is your relationship with God, not mine. I will pray for you but even God cannot control your own free will, if you are not willing to change from within, there is not much I can do. And if you keep disobeying, you will be disciplined by God whether through mommy and daddy or not.
All I am doing is trying to obey my husband's decision which is obeying God's law. So even I said all right, I still respect daddy's final decision which is we go to iHop on Thursday.
On the other hand, if you choose to obey, you will get rewarded for behaving and get to eat at iHop tomorrow, all your need is patience and obedience."
My son was stunned and out of words, he stormed off to his room for half an hour. Came back wanting to eat (probably hungry) and ready to compromise to finish all the tasks, so he still get to eat out on Thursday.
Pro 8:32 "Now then, my sons, listen to me; blessed are those who keep my ways.
Pro 8:33 Listen to my instruction and be wise; do not ignore it.
Pro 8:34 Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway.
Pro 8:35 For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the LORD .
Pro 8:36 But whoever fails to find me harms himself; all who hate me love death."
Praise the Lord! With God's wisdom, I don't even have to yell at my son any more, I was calmly talking when he was jumping up and down, trying all the ways to test my limit. :) And my strong willed son eventually gave in to obey his parents!